Me, Myself & I.Drama Queen

2006-10-30T08:54:00.000-08:00

Escaped my own Loneliness Complex

Woke up early once more. With only 7 hours of sleep!! Sighness.

Then went online, blah blah.

SMSing Fernando. And eventually arranged to meet at City Hall. I wanted to go Esplanade area to get out of the house for a while. So, yea, met him. Of course, I was late. But he was 2mins later! Ha!

Went walking to Esplanade. Returned Mama's library books. Bought cupcorn, candy floss, drinks. Walked to a 'quiet' place to sit down & chat. We chatted [once again] about Adam! Haha!! Adam got paranoid too. Kept on SMSing me, asking why am I meeting Fernando for dinner....

Actually, supposed to meet Mama as well. But she!! Had to back out last minute. Dammit.

So Fernando & I decided to go for a movie. DOA!

Fernando: It's a BIMBO movie!!
Me: Wells, all the more I will like it!
Fernando: Hmm. Yea true.
Me: -.- [tempted to smack his head]

Then we passed by this picture....The basic of it was merely a whole page of faces, then a huge similar middle one. However, the middle one does not have eyes nor nose, only a mouth. In front of the middle face, is a table with white ornaments, which were the basic to life.

So my analysation of the picture is - That there are several other people looking and breathing in the essence of life itself. However, the middle one with the mouth is the main speaker to everything, grabbing all the attention, and bringing in front of the the basis of life itself.

Fernando: Wow. Since when did bimbos get to smart?
Me: I aim to surprise. :P

Wells, DOA was mainly okay. Although I expected much more of the storyline. Good action & all, but no substance.

Then after so, went to MOS Burger for dinner.

Encountered a couple of retarded boys who tried to act cool. Bah.

Chatted.

Fernando spilled mayo on his pants. Haha! And he remembered the other time we went out to eat Burger King, he spilled tomato on his pants as well.

I completely forgot 'bout it.

Then he sent me home.

By the time he got home himself, Adam was already asleep. Haha! Kinda good in a way, yea? God knows what that boy will do.

Alrites. Kinda tired actually. And tomorrow I got a PACKED day.

Muah! Ciao!

2006-10-29T19:26:00.000-08:00

Gimme the Definition

Yesterday was a normal day I guess. I'm trying to find as much time to spend with me, myself & I before I start work! When I start, especially the first few weeks, it's gonna be tedious. I won't have anytime for myself...So better cherish myself!! *water wells up in eyes*

But I did have a craving to catch a movie. So I called my cousin, I mean, she means a lot to me!! I see my friends all the time, [you guys mean a lot to me too!!!!!!!] its just that I didn't hang out with her for quite some time. Then, this stupid baboon, replied my msg so late. And by the time she called me, I was already in Bishan.

I lazed on the couch...for about 10mins....

Mama: Adam & Jonathon are at Junction 8.
Me: Oh okay.
Mama: Fernando is upstairs studying.
Me: Oh really...*evil glint*

I couldn't resist! Haha!!

So I climbed up the stairs, and made my way into his silent solitude. I mean, I found it hard to believe he could be studying. Hahaha!! Then I saw him sitting on the chair, head facing out the window, rocking to the so-called music he listens to. No offence, but his kinda music, not my kind.

Apple spotted me, duh! But he didn't give me away. So I went up to Fernando and knocked his head.

Fernando: AAAHHH!! *jumps up in shock*

He almost literally jumped.

Friggin' funny.

Fernando: Adam is in Junction 8.
Me: I don't care.
Fernando: Oh yes you do!

Then we started chatting about Adam again. He sure has become a hot topic to talk about.

And Fernando showed me this analysis essay he wrote of me. GOSH! This guy knows me a hell lot. Wells, about 75%. He can point out exactly what and why I'm doing things the way I do. Truly amazing. Even my mom, who knew me all my life, doesn't know. His essay was more or less correct. Naturally, a bit off here and there. But generally, on the whole, I am impressed.

The way he analysed was like as if I was some literature book. He could recall practically everything I had said, and did. And of course, when Adam got home, he got jealous.

Haha.

I went downstairs to get my mom her stuff from my bag, then he was downstairs waiting. I went up to pass my mom her stuff, then went down again.

Adam: What are you and Fernando doing in the room? Closed the door, and the lights off....
Me: Nothing. Just chatting.

Then he kept on questioning....

Me: Y'know...Fernando knows me really well.
Adam: Really.

Then I stopped there. Before he exploded in jealousy and God knows what he will do to that skinny dudette..[Fernando]

After that, I went up to Fernando's room again. And I scared him again by wriggling my hands in front of him. HAHAHAHA!

He went to call Adam into the room. And then Adam and I talked. Barely joked.

I don't know. He tried to crack a few jokes here and there, but I didn't really find it funny. Ah wells.

Fernando is so right. I laugh over what I don't even find funny. Damn, I am weird.

Eventually, we went Junction 8 for dinner at Pasta Mania.

Zaw called me 3 times, but I didn't hear my phone. So I went out to call him, since Pasta Mania had no reception. He just called to ask me if I know this song....I met another weirdo. Haha!

Then Adam came out.

Adam: Why just now when I told you that another girl likes me, you didn't get jealous? Don't you love me?

Y'see, he told me earlier that Fernando's sister wants to know him. Wells, a lot of girls wanna know him anyways.

Me: Erm. Of course I do...Its just that, I don't show I am jealous. And anyways, it's quite a good thing that so many girls like you! I mean, the guy that a lot of girls want, only wants me!!!

Adam: Really?

Me: Haha. Yups.

Sigh.

After so, the boys went walking home. Mama & I went home as well.

That basically concluded my day.

[The following lines do not necessarily point at any particular person. Just smth I feel like typing.]

You had always been there.
Everything I needed, in front of me.
But I was always too playful to see.
Nothing had been fair.
I tried to fall in love.
Maybe I did,
But everytime in front of you,
it's only a false grin.
All the tough times you saw me through,
No one knows me better than you.
Girls swarm around you,
Guys to me too.
So both of us do not really need each other,
just pick another person -
maybe we could still live happily ever after.
If only life was that simple.
When I saw you go,
I realized who I really love.
When I saw you leave,
You took away a piece of me.
But I never surfaced my pains,
I would always act dry -
Even in the pouring rain.
You gave me security to hold,
You gave me enough affection to know,
that you mean it when you say,
'I love you'.

2006-10-28T09:35:00.000-07:00

'Fickle' is mah middle name.

Yes, Lai. You are right. Maybe fickleness is in my genes ya?? Haha!!

Now, I'm seriously confused & mixed up. I could swear I'm over Zaw. But why am I still thinking of the times we spent together? Although they were not many....Haha.

I guess I could think so much coz' I got so much free time now. I'm trying to keep myself free, until I work. Treasure my free time till then!! If not by then, I will be....AAAAAHHH!! I won't have time to think of my next breath!!

What did I see in Zaw ???????

I was just telling Lai what it was like to be with him. This guy, was no help. He just kept on grinning. Blardy asswipe. :D But I'm glad even though Lai & I didn't work out together, we're still chatting like friends. Zaw & I are like, "do I even know you??" Well, at least I feel that way!!

Adam went to meet Tina today with Jonathon. According to Fernando, he is trying to matchmake Tina & Jonathon. I don't know. I'm supposed to be jealous right? Hmm, I guess to a certain extend. But I don't give a damn actually. Meet then meet. Put it this way, he is not mine. Now, if you say Zaw went to meet another girl, I will flare. Haha! Stupid of me. Coz' Zaw is no longer mine either.

I decided to be some loner today. Mama wanted me to join her for some lunch and dinner event. But I decided to play a low profile.

Mama: Just come!! My friends want to see you!!!

Me: Oh, [lying on the bed] they can see me another time! [rolls over] Enjoy yourself!! [GRIN!]

One reaon why I didn't wanna go was because, their lunch was at Novena. I'm gonna keep scarce of that area for a while. Just in case, yes ?

For those who don't know....Zaw lives there. And everytime I met him there when we were together.

Then I stayed at home, napped.

When out at night to Holland V to buy my dinner. I bought SUBWAY!! I ate soooo much. I scared myself. I ate the entire foot long subway melt, 3 cookies and large diet coke. *burp!!*

Then took a cab home. The driver had MAJOR attitude problems. Yucks.

Adam called. Our conversation was in chinese, duh!

Adam: Sorry I didn't reply your msg, I told you my phone has no more money right?

Me: Yups. Don't worry 'bout it. You went out with Tina today right?

Adam: Yea.

Me: Thats good! Had fun?

Adam: Nope. Prefer being with you. But today was just going to being Jonathon and Tina together. Now Tina belongs to Jonathon...

Me: Whatever you say....

Adam: Oei!! Really. Believe me okay?

Me: Haha! Yea.

Adam: Do you love me?

Me: Erm. Yea. Do you love me?

Adam: I do.

Me: Yups. Anything else?

Adam: Nope. Okay. Bye bye.

Maybe Fernando is right. I said 'I love you' before so many times in my life, it's routine. But to other people, it means different things. It holds different values. To Adam, he only says it when he really means it. But with me, its different. I could just go up to a stranger and say it with no problem.

Me: But he told me he loves Tina too....

Fernando: Try to understand. He is only a growing kid. Still young, sim? But he knows the one he REALLY wants and loves is you.

Me: Eww. I'm a selfish girl. I don't share. But if Tina really wants him, I can give him to her. I'm a generous soul !

Fernando: -.- Didn't you just say you were selfish? Anyways, this question has been bugging me. Will you believe me if I still like you?

Me: Yea. Why not? Adam told me. He is mightly jealous.

Fernando: No wonder he gives me those looks. So intimidating!

WAHAHAHA.

Fernando can be friggin entertaining sometimes.

Cannot blame Adam for feeling threatened.

Fernando's age is more ideal in matching to mine.

I had known Fernando for a long time, since I was a little girl. Wells, like when I was Primary 3 or 4? Okay...Not SOOO little.

Fernando speaks English. Haha. Which Adam is still trying to master. So communication is much easier for Fernando.

Fernando is always gets me laughing when chatting with him. Adam is more serious.

But when Fernando heard that Adam is threatened by him...His reaction was.....

MUAHAHA! THIS GUY HAS A SERIOUS INSECURITY COMPLEX!!!!!!

Now I only wanna see Adam all the time.

At the same time, I wanna be the way I was with Zaw.

Dammit.

Fickleness ARE in my genes.

To Ker/Darling/Kotong/Sister : Sorry for not telling you. I was scared you were still studying. Haha!! Yes yes, I remember our dates! And our x'mas prezzies to each other! Thanks for everything...Wo ai ni !! I really miss those times we shared...I almost cried while watching our videos just now. Haha! Siao liao. Do well for your O's!

Muah! Ciao!

2006-10-27T08:36:00.000-07:00

My, My, I move on fast

Most of you might not believe this.
I'm actually over Zaw already. Hahahaha!! Its really quick, I know. Actually, I was over in the late afternoon already. Now its COMPLETELY over. Wonder what did I see in him. I mean, he was nothing really. He doesn't show that he loves me, and money sucking.

Just now, Adam came over. Although I smsed him not to. My mom couldn't even give him lessons today! I am still quite pissed with him! Well, I WAS quite pissed. Considering I got news he kissed another girl.....But the REAL story..[according to Adam and Fernando...]

This girl, likes him. During that period of time, I wasn't showing Adam any care or concern. He thus thought I didn't care bout him. So when this girl kissed him, he allowed it. Plus, he isn't the kinda guy to reject a girl. [Dangerous, I know.]

Wells, stuff happened. Nothing extreme of course!!!!!!! I confessed to him already, "Actually, if I didn't feel that Zaw doesn't love me, I wouldn't give a damn to you." And he didn't seem to mind. So I linked this to him kissing the girl. Its the same thing !!! Therefore, I cannot blame him.

Think I was wrong, I didn't love Zaw. It was just my efforts I put in for lasting the 2mths bet. Then it dragged on.

Ah wells, over that.

And KER!! I'm not gonna get attached again so quickly lah! I know you know me well........But. Haiya. I better not talk so soon...... :P

Ciao!!

2006-10-26T18:14:00.000-07:00

I didn't know. Till I lost you.

Well wells, woke up pretty early today! Couldn't really sleep actually. Maybe coz' I was thinking quite intensively 'bout Zaw. Y'see, even if I didn't break up with him, I would also be unhappy - he doesn't show me love!! So, either way I will still get hurt. May as well just get it over & done with, yes ?

But then again, I didn't know that I really loved him till I lost him. I know I was supposed to fall in love with someone so acting would be easier. Something to do with releasing of emotions or something....Yups. And also I should quit it before I TOTALLY fall in love. So I quited before I really TOTALLY fell in love. I didn't know it would hurt so much. I didn't cry....Coz' I didn't want Mama to see. Haha! I don't know...One side of me wants him back so much, yet the other side thinks it's better we are not together. I mean, I actually have more to gain if we break. My friends will stop complaining, I don't have to think of him all the time if he needs me to do anything....And many more.

As some of you may know, there is the China Boy. Haha!! He is history too! Gosh, last night was like...The Removal Of The Bad Boys! Kays, lame.

Y'see, my 'stepdaddy' is the owner of the school China Boy is in. I mean, that's how I came to know him. And there are news going around that China Boy kissed this girl in school who likes him. Then when my 'stepdaddy' asked if he loves me or that girl, he said me. Bullshit.

Somehow I was not really hurt at all upon hearing that. I was much more hurt and affected by Zaw. My mom was quite shocked that I had no emotions coming out. Wahaha! Now the China Boy broke his promise, I don't have to play the part of mine. I'm freeeee!!!!

But still, yearn for Zaw back. Yet still, I want him to come back only if he knows to show that he loves me. If not, it would just be another breakup.

Oh yes! And thank you to my friends who were by my side last night. Although you were all generally quite happy that I broke up with him. Hahaha!! Makes the pain a lot easier to bear. These were mainly the people....

Violet -> For calling me just SECONDS after we officially broke up. Although you were going thru some problems too. Haha! Both of us ended moaning to each other.

Eeqah -> No, girl!! I am still single! I don't just get re-attached in one night!!!

Nat -> Yes, finally! And I know it's wrong to miss him since he probably doesn't miss me.

Ash -> Thanks for consoling me on the phone. Haha!! And really caring about me. I'm so touched! :) Don't worry 'bout me. I don't dwell in things for too long - not my thang.

Cat -> Haha!! OMG!

And to the other people out there, don't worry!!!!!!!! It's not me to dwell in something for long. At the most, a few days ?

Muah! Ciao!

2006-10-26T02:36:00.000-07:00

My mind is made up. Well, almost.

Many of my friends had been practically BEGGING that I break up with Zaw. Wells, it happened today!!

I don't know exactly what it is that I see in him, seriously. I just feel happy when I'm by his side. He cheers me up with just his phone call ; makes me upset when he fails to say 'I love you'. And this happened on countless occasions.

Lemme list out to you the reasons why I broke up with him.

1. Peer pressure - my friends just keep on insulting him, telling me how bad he is, that he is not good enough, and that he is cheating on me.

2. Money - let's not talk 'bout this one. Those who know 'bout this, keep it to yourself!!

3. Insecurity - he was never able to make me know that he really loves me. Even on those few occasions when he did, never lasted longer than a day.

4. Temptation - kays, this could be my fault. Because I feel he doesn't love me, I feel very swayed to others.

5. Attention & concern - hardly had these. When I was sick, it wasn't him who called me all the time to check if I was okay, or came to my house to give me medicine.

6. Love - none of it.

Good reasons, yes?

Sigh, I think this is just a weakness I got. I'm feeling a little...empty ? Maybe coz' he took up so much of my thoughts as to..WHY IS THIS BF LIKE THIS???

Oh wells, its over.

2006-10-13T09:20:00.000-07:00

A Day With My Babes!

Okays. Today, I went to meet Eeqah, Fang and Violet!! Supposed to meet at Cineplex, but an idiot like me!! Went to CineLEISURE. I didn't realize till Eeqah called me. Wahaha! So I had to walk all the way back to the bus stop, luckily the bus came fast.

We went to watch scoop!! At the front part, we were not really sure about the show....Coz' we didn't even know what the movie was 'bout really. Haha!! But on the whole, was kinda cool. Fangs & I shared a Couples Combo. I felt so paiseh asking for it!!! Haha!!

Fangs : Lets share a couples combo!!

Me: [ordering] Erm....C-couples combo. Yup.

Then, after the movie - We took an MRT to Orchard! When we walked out of the MRT, some random fella approached me about some modelling thing. So I lied.

"I am Nycole. Age 19. Number...." [I forgot which number I gave alrdy.]

Went walking around. Then went to Coffee Bean at Taka.

Took some random pics.

What you doin' violet??

What the.....

Fangs can do cock-eyes so well!! Eeqah, can't make it!!!! =P

Paul Twohill wanna-be!!!!!

MUSTACHE!!

~mmm Fang Fang.

Gerry heart Fang.

Candid - Lets see now babe....

Actin' innocent. May emphasize...ACTIN'

Yes girls. I know you LOVE the muffin.

Gerry & Fang @ CoffeeBean.

Y'know the music notes?? Doe-Ray-Mi !!!

Shoot her, and catch her.

Camera, camera, in Eeqah's hand....

ARGH!!!

WORLD PEACE

We chatted, and they told me some stuff bout Zaw. Tried convincing me to break with him coz' they think he is cheating on me.

Then, Gough came. We sat there, bitched a bit more.

Walked out to buy some snacks.

Then went to sit down outdoors, waited for Shane.

Aww. Ain't they sweet?

Chatted again, bitched again. Shane told me about Zaw's issue. I'm blardy confused now. I seriously don't know what to do.

Anyways, we went to Paragon. Sat down, and Marklin was late!! Supposed to meet me at 5.45, but he just woke up at 6!! So I had to wait for him till 6.45. In the meantime, ...

Wha...Did you say ?

OOPSY!! Caught me redhanded!!!

Allure me dahling.

Ooh.Sweet kisser.

Yes, babe. You got me.

Over & over again.

Girlfriend.

Babe.

Then, they went off to dinner. I called Marklin, and I had to go Heeren to pick him up. When I first came out to see him, he didn't even recognize me!! Considering he didn't see me for.....about 2-3yrs?? He was quite shocked.

Marklin : You have grown prettier.

Then the poor boy was starving. Haha! And said we will go for dinner after seeing Kate.

She looked better. I really hope she is doing fine. Love you, girl!! :) Then Marklin was trying to crack some jokes here & there. Haha. And some other of their church people came. A girl and guy. The 2 guys talked and talked, hilarious. Wahaha.

Then went off to have dinner at Cine, KFC. Coz' Marklin wanted the cheese thing. Marklin & I catched up a wee bit on times. After that, the guy went off. 3 of us went walking around looking for a gift. Then off to home!!!

I called Mama if she wanted anything for dinner - Coz' this stubborn woman didn't wanna go out for dinner. Then she said she wanted to go market, then wanted me to go with her.

Jase called. Ron smsed. I suspected smth. Confusing & long story. Can't be bothered to tell. But the underline is, I can't trust Ron. And I guess coz' of me...Jase went to curse & swear at Ron. Then Jase said some stuff like, it hurts him when I ignore him coz' he really loves me. Sweet. But no thanks.

Alrite. Thats it for today!

Ciao!!

2006-09-27T06:24:00.000-07:00

Beware The Dragon Lady; her truth is an unwelcomed mystery, her twist is on poison lips.

I know my recent entries have been...negative. Haha! I was going thru an insecurity complex. Sorraye if I made any of you worry, and thanks to my girls for being there. Although you all spent most of the time encouraging the break!! Anyways, you all were still there.

Yesterday, went to watch Forbidden City at Esplanade. Woo-hoo!! I LOVE plays! Especially with my darling friends. I was running really late, so I took a cab down to meet Eeqah & Natalina. And finally when I got there, just nice, Eeqah called me.

Eeqah : Where are you ??

Well, considering I was 30mins late. I couldn't blame her for sounding a little pissed off.

Me : Erm. At the Robinsons taxi stand.

And before I knew it, Eeqah opened the door for me.

Eeqah : XIAO JIE!! XING!!

This girl picks up Chinese almost as quickly as I pick up vulgar Indian words. :P

Eeqah : Wow. You look good!!!

Me : Thanks! You too! :)

I love her dress!!

Then, Nat was waiting inside for us. She stuck her tongue at me through the glass door!! What a greeting....

Finally, met with Evelina & Thinn. Poor Thinn, got a scolding from her mom. DON'T WORRY GIRL!! WE ARE HERE!! :)

We went for dinner together. Only 4 of us ; Eeqah, Nat, Evelina & I. Somehow, we let ourselves be convinced by Nat that the other way to Esplanade, [not the underground way] was faster!

Eeqah & Me : HUH?! But that way we have to cross roads!!!!! We are on heels & wedges you know ??

Evelina & Nat : *rolls their eyes*

Then while walking, Nat asked me bout Zaw.

Evelina : Broke up already ??

Me : Well, kinda.....

Eeqah : It's not confirmed!!

Me : I don't know. I somehow feel he doesn't wanna let go yet.

Nat : Ahh. Okay...Well...

Me : Maybe I should call to confirm with him!

Evelina : No!! Don't call him! Let him call you....

Fine..

So, we walked and walked. Eeqah was complaining bout her blistering feet. I almost fell twice!! Evelina's little toe was killing her. Nat's ankle was red. Haha!!

All the causes of the "believed-to-be-shorter-way-to-Esplanade".

Eventually, we went to Thai Express to eat. And guess what ?? I think they forgot my order...

So, I called for someone to check on it. When I asked for it to be checked, they just started!!

I was so blardy pissed off. I was already so damn hungry, and we had a play to catch.

Waitress : Sorry miss. They just started.

Nat : *flaring up*

Me : (Quickly!) Okay! Just please hurry. I have a play to catch.

Waitress : Yes miss.

Nat : Gerry, call the manager.

Me : Give them a little time lah.

Then, we waited for like..10mins.

Nat : Gerry. Call the manager!!!

Me : Fine fine.

So I called the manager. Who in the nick of time, served my food.

However, Nat was not satisfied. When we went to pay our bill...She scrolled down to the service charge. And said really loudly.

Nat : Wa lau! Service charge is almost $5!! And the service is so bad....

Haha! This girl ah.

We went to meet up Pam, Wenfu, Miss Lee and the rest...

Miss Lee : Hello girls. Nice outfits.

Me : Thanks! Yours too :)

Eeqah : Thanks!

Nat scooted off to find Wenfu I think. Haha!

Then, we went into the theatre.

The play was...REALLY GOOD. I could really feel their emotions!! There was a strong connection that the 2 lead actresses were able to give off. The comedy was just given in the right amount of dosage - so as to not turn the mood of the audience to merely laughing & laughing. The tense moments were really tensed up. Scandalous was...scandal. Haha!!

Basically, I loved the musical!!! If only I could act in such plays too....Sigh. Wahaha.

However, the audience I was sitting with was..childish. They laughed at tensed and intimate scenes. They talked through some parts. I wouldn't mind if I had to pay extra to watch with a better audience next time!

Met Wenfu outside. Then Cat's dad gave me a lift home. So sweet! And he insisted on sending me INTO my house, not just stopping at the MRT. Thanks, uncle.

Wenfu greeted me online....

"Welcome home. Beware the dragon lady."

I was like.. -.-

Wahahaha.

Alrite. Thats my day basically. Ciao!

2006-09-24T07:25:00.000-07:00

Bored of being bored

May as well be single.
You are hardly ever there.
Your calls come once in a while.
And mostly because of some random journal.
You say 'I love you'; rarely.
Dates hardly happened these few days.
Tell me you don't want me to be bored.
But I wanna tell you, I am.
You make me feel insecure all the time.
I won't be shocked if you are cheating on me.
I mean, hey, you are in a poly.
You got a hot body & huge ego.
An ideal prey for girls to poach.
You probably consider yourself single in school.
Maybe you are spending more time with your real girlfriend.
Tell me the truth, and I will know what to do.
I won't cling; it's not my thang.
I will drop you like hot cake, this very instant.
Nothing 'bout you which makes me feel special sometimes.
So, just tell me if I'm just another foolish girl.
Coz' in about a few days, I'm about to let you go.
I held on very hard, don't say I didn't try.
But you hardly show that you love me.
For some like me, I kinda know what it means.
So,
Adios,
Mi Armor.

2006-09-24T05:44:00.000-07:00

Another bet.

Typing this now in Fernando's room..And I just lost a bet. Which was not officially one okay!! Fernando cheated....BIG TIME!

It started with a conversation during dinner. I was dreading my Lontong; barely touched it! So much so, everyone finished and went to watch TV. Fernando came back later, and sat down with me. So we started talking....About Atom. Haha!!

Fernando : He asked a lot about you. A lot of weird questions....
Me : Does he still like me?
Fernando : Yea. He keeps on asking me what kinda girl you are, what kinda guys you like....So! How is Zaw?? [doing that dumbass action]
Me : Bad. He is not showing me enough attention and affection. I'm feeling so blardy insecure...
Fernando : Hmm! Maybe he is not showing it to you because he doesn't want you to take him for granted! He is merely stratergizing....
Me : Yea. He told me before. He doesn't want me to be bored of him. But! I'm feeling so insecure all the time, I'm feeling tired & BORED of feeling insecure. I mean, its not like there aren't other guys!
Fernando : Like Atom!! In 4yrs time, you 2 will be together. You will chase him.
Me : Yea right. I don't chase guys.....
Fernando : What about Zaw?? [dumbass action again] You said he is the first guy....
Me : No! He is the first guy that got me in only 2 days! Get that right!!
Fernando : Oh right right. But anyways, Atom says all the girls chase him!
Me : Tell him to dream on about me chasing him....
Fernando : Hey! He is a rich tycoon okay?? He said before, if he marries you, you will have a nice big house.....His family really likes you too!
Me : Yea. I know....

Then, went up to Fernando's room. And started chatting about stuff.

Fernando : Okay. What are the pros & cons of breaking up ??

And apparently, by this 'pros & cons' method, breaking up is the way to go.

Then, we had a bet. If Atom [who is in the house now!] calls me before Zaw does, I will consider him. I thought he would call me only after I left the house or something.....But!

*RING TONE*
Me : Hello?
Atom : Chi bao le mah?
Me : FERNANDO!!!! [shouting downstairs]

Then Fernando came up.

Me : Cheater!
Fernando : What?! He did call you before Zaw!! [dumbass action]
Me : I don't expect Zaw to call anyways! Sometimes he is practically dead!
Fernando : Well, still did call you.
Me : Well, I only said I would CONSIDER.
Fernando : Atom is such a nice guy! He will treat you better than Zaw [dumbass action] does!

Blah blah blah. Everyone says that. And I know its true. But I don't love anyone more than Zaw. If I did, break up would have happened long before my time.

Fernando listed quite a list for Atom...
1. He is rich.
2. I get my big house.
3. I get all the attention, affection & love.
4. He likes dogs.
5. His family likes me.
6. Quite intelligent.
7. Spends a lot of time with my mom.
8. He is a true gentleman.
9. Willing to spend a lot of time with me.
10. Will call regularly.'

Haha. Almost seems perfect huh. Expect for the fact that he is 3 YEARS YOUNGER!!! [however, very mature for his age -words from Fernando]

Haha! He is next to me now.

Wells, only time will tell how things turn out ya? We'll see how I work out with Zaw.

Love ya people!

2006-09-23T09:42:00.000-07:00

HAPPIE BIRTHDAY CUZ'

Well well. Ryan said I didn't update for a long time..Which is..NOT VERY TRUE!! Haha!

So, fine! I shall update 'bout today then!!

Today, as usual..SUPPOSED [means we didn't eventually] to meet Zaw. Kinda disappointed at first of course. I would be crazy if I wasn't right??

I was SUPPOSED [also means didn't eventually...] to meet Pamela & XinYun in town at 1.30pm. But I DID meet them eventually alrite?? Just that I was there at 3.30pm......Took a cab down. And we scouted around Lucky Plaza. It was seriously the first time I entered there in like..almost forever!! We went looking for SHOES!! And Pam got me a pair of wedges for my birthday!! HOW SWEET!! Although it is like....a month over late. Better late than never!! Now I owe more people birthday presents......

As usual, I bought the shoes I saw in the first store I went to. Its the story of my life ; I start somewhere, find something I quite like. Make a whole big round, and realize the I love the first one best. Wahaha!!

Walked over to the bus stop, and took bus to the Bishan house. Adam was having tuition with Mama. As usual, he was so shy. Mama was amused by him!! Anni was playing with Apple. Apple was running away. Fernando came home and just rotted in front of the TV. So everything was pretty much the same. Oh! And Anni & I were watching this show....Like any other typical Indian love show, it has a lot of songs....And of which, I barely understood a single word in the song!!

---FIRST SONG---
Anni : So romantic....
Me: Yup. Kinda sweet. The way he holds her...
Anni : Your bf should be like that what!!
Me : Ha! Please....

---SECOND SONG---
Anni : Lalalala...
Me : ............This is a kinda.....Long song?

---THIRD SONG---
Anni : -in the kitchen cooking-
Me : ..Another song..Alamak.

---FOUTH SONG---
Anni : -back from kitchen, sitting down-
Me : AAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Fernando & I had a small bicker. I went up to say bye to Adam, as commanded by Mama. I wouldn't do it on my own will you know!

Took a cab down to Kath's house. And gave her the present!! She seemed to love it....Hahahaha!! Seriously, I thought I wouldn't be able to make it. My emotions had been fluctuating DRASTICALLY these few days. And sometimes, beyond my control.

Considering that my own birthday was a flop in the family......It was the first time I never got a lot of presents from the family. Well, I guess I am growing up...But even when I grow up, I still want presents!! Kay, I may find this childish one day. Well, Kath got quite a few cool presents. And I found out, 3yee's birthday present...Was given to my cousins too! Some birthday present!! But oh well, my friends made it rawk!! And I managed to contain my feelings pretty much well enough I guess. More or less...Hope I did not leak out anything bad!!

We ate cake. Watched TV. Chatted. Laughed. Went home.

Same old family thing.

Alrite. Ciao!

Oh yea, I consulted some people...And they said he is taking me for granted. Not only one person said that. They said that I should go for someone else, since he never really cared about me. People are practically begging me to give him up. As much as his words may SOMETIMES say he loves me, his actions barely show it. Maybe you guys are right.

2006-09-16T08:20:00.000-07:00

My Shopping Urge......Unsatisfied.Bird shitted on him!!

Today, I woke up at 12+. Hoping to get a sms or missed call from him..considering we didn't talk for bout 2-3days?? But, oh wells, maybe he is busy. Instead, I was greeted with an sms from Sally - one of the students from Hong Kong.

Sally : HI

So....I replied. While I was still groggy in bed.

Me : Heyy.

Sally : Are you free today? Shall we hang out at novena?

I was like..NOVENA?! Out of all places...Because of that idiot I am there most of the time!! Then you are asking me to go again?????? Then, baby called. Said wanna meet me, go plaza sing..I changed all my plans just for him, but then he called to say he can't go. Because of tummy upset. Ass. Oh well, its not really his fault if he had a tummy upset..

Anyways,went for lunch with grandpa & grandma. Then, grandpa gave me extra $$!!! Oooh-lala. :D!! Wells, I took a bus to Jurong Interchange.And some charity guy approached me.I must look really friendly or something!!! I bought $4..[2 tickets] from him. I must be thoroughly crazy...But I just felt like taking lots of buses. So I took 198 back to my house mrt.Then took another 105 to Far East to meet Sally. The poor girl was waiting for almost an hour! But even when I got there, she didn't answer her phone calls! I was getting quite agitated!!! But after a few calls, she answered. FINALLY. Then she came up to meet me. We went walking around..and I found this top I LOVE. But I was scared I won't have enough cash to last the time till mama is back..So I decided to hold back!! Then, Sally & I took a bus to Newton mrt...And then a train to City Hall.

Went walking around again...Hoping to find something to buy!! But no avail...Sighness. Ryan and I were smsing thru the day. Supposed to meet him only after I sent Sally back to the mrt, but this fella had to come earlier. Haha!! And met his funny brudder...Ducky!! Haha!! Sent Sally back to the mrt, coz she has to be home early..Then we went to wait for the bus to Holland V to meet Ya Hui.

And...While this Ryan was singing....*PIAK!!* BIRD SHIT!!!! Hahahahahahaha!! I had to take out a tissue for him to clean...So disgusting....Eww. They were cracking jokes all the time, and we waited for 61 for almost 45mins!! It never came. So we decided to jay walk!! To the other bus stop which had more buses available.And this 2 came up with this WEIRD theory....

Doug : It is Singaporean to jay walk!!!!

Ryan : If you don't jay walk....you are a foreigner!!!

Me : -.-"

Wells, when we arrived at the other bus stop....61 went by......

Me : Eh? 61!!

Doug : O_O!! AAAAHHH!!

Ryan : See lah! All your fault lah!!

Everything is doug's fault........Haha

Finally the bus came!! But it was so damn slow!!!

Doug : This bus is soooo fast......

Ryan : Yup! I can feel myself....FLYING!!

Hilarious these 2!!!

Then Ryan & I took a pic!

Used my phone lah...but when bluetoothed to him. Its so much nicer on his phone!!! So much clearer and sharper!!! Grr. Oh wells. Then met Ya Hui. It was my first time seeing her....And she said the weirdest thing!

Ryan : Ya Hui! This is Geraldine! Geraldine, this is Ya Hui!

Me : Heyy. :)

Ya Hui : Oh. Your gf ah??

Me & Ryan : No lah!

After she saw the pic we took in the bus, she said...

Ya Hui : Really leh. You 2 look like a couple. Very sweet...

Me : Haha! Better not let his gf hear it....

We went to NYDC for dinner...And I couldn't finish my pasta. Haha! So I gave it to Ryan...who gladly finished it all up for me. This guy!! A cheese-consumer!

He ate about....1 and half pasta.Haha! And somemore...still can eat desert!! Bottomless pit. Still can ask if we going for supper or not...

Ya Hui : Don't ever treat Ryan! You will just go broke...

Then Ryan let us hear some stuff in his handphone..Some prank call stuff. Haha!! Weirdo...

And took some pics with Ya Hui's cam.

Ryan & I call this the 'distance metre'. Haha! Coz' Ryan & I are close..I & Ya Hui are distant..Ya Hui & Doug are DISTANTER!!! If there is such a word...haha!

Right after so, we went walking around. And Doug brought us for a tour inside the Holland V fine dining area. But he was talking mainly to Ya Hui. Why ?? Probably because some pple..like Ryan!! Just kept on cracking jokes with me and I just kept on laughing. Hahaha!!

Luckily Ryan didn't send me home. It will be so inconvenient for him!!

I got home, hoping to chat with Zaw. But he went offline in like...3mins? Don't know lah...And I'm gonna see these 2 weirdos again tomorrow. Haha! Alrite. That's basically my day!!

2006-09-14T09:03:00.000-07:00

Now I have come up with it!!! Read on....Oh, this is the girl version.

10 Reasons NOT to Fall In Love

1. It would be wrong to oogle at hot[ter] guys in front of him. [which might be most of the time!]

2. The stress is intense when you meet his friends!!! [they keep on spectulating you - especially the girls]

3. There is this major bad thing going if your friends don't like him. [well, it's good if your friends DO like him.]

4. You feel this constant need to please him!!! [hey! it may not be a bad thing..but! so constant!! it becomes a burden...]

5. There is a huge competition going on sometimes. [what makes you think other girls won't try to poach your prize, girl??]

6. You will suffer from insecurity if you really love him. [trust me! it could kill you just hoping he is not playing you!! because sometimes, you know you were a player too!]

7. You will dream of him every night. [can get really boring....and most of the dreams just never come true.]

8. You are on his every beck & call!! [like some dog or something...]

9. If you guys do break up, you get depression!! BIG TIME! [and most of the time, depression makes you eat more! means: you gain more fat!]

10. You are not free to flirt around with other guys/suitors. [i mean..to flirt while you are attached?? sorry, i dropped that game long ago.because its totally wrong!]

Now, lets get onto something else....

11 Reasons to Fall In Love :)

1. You got someone to oogle at!! [beauty lies in the eyes of the beholder, babe! if you chose him, he's gotta be hot! to you, at least...]

2. You soak up in attention with his friends!! [who cares what they think?? now more people know you!! just be confident girl!]

3. More topics to talk about with your friends...[nothing is more delicious than sharing stuff bout your guy..almost nothing...]

4. You make yourself a better person!! [because you wanna make him happy, you change.and usually its for the better...of course! be a good judge to know if its the right change!]

5. You get to show off your prize....[there will always be some girls admiring your guy; so you got it?? flaunt it!!]

6. You melt & swoon when he says those simple 4 words!! "I love you, baby." [trust me..its just different when the guy you love says it.it clears almost every other bad feeling.]

7. He will be your fantasy ...[and this fantasy is your guy!! what could make your day better than that??]

8. You will be listening to every whim he makes. [nothing pleases yourself more than pleasing the one you love.]

9. Let's just say you guys do break up, [touch wood!] you get the experience!! [hey, girl! all things gotta come to an end somehow.just take it as another BGR lesson! now you got more skills & experience at hand!!]

10. You got an anchor for your heart, so you won't get hurt elsewhere!! [flirting will seem like an old game you quit! because you wanna be loyal..]

11. You feel blissful, and could never be happier. [because you found someone you truly wanna spend the rest of your life with..and that someone feels the same way too. :)]

2006-09-14T01:40:00.000-07:00

The Missing Piece....
This is meant for someone.Hope you get it. :) Nothing more.

Y'see, life, as I always said.. Is a Play.
Better not screw up the script.
Now, boy, listen to every word I say.
You've been sweet..You've managed to make me happy.
Everyone knows, I know, you love me.
But there is an ending for everything, isn't there?
People change thru time, boy.
To just chuck you aside so quickly won't be fair.
It was fun at first, I thought I loved you.
We spent 3 long years together.
True.
And I admit, no one so far has been able..
To make my heart beat faster.
You say things which make my fairy tales real.
Every word you said was magic.
Every whisper you made was a true romantic.
You made me blush.
You made me sigh.
The world seemed beautiful with you inside.
But hey, it's over.
You let me go.
Even though you kept on telling me you don't wanna do so.
Still did, rite?
I really don't know if I ever did love you.
But I believe that in a life..
A person can only really love one other person.
I don't know anymore.
Sometimes I'm not even sure if Zaw & I are good together.
Anyways, you take care.
You can be anywhere, anytime.
But remember you are never alone..
I'm never too far.
Somehow, I never was.

2006-09-12T09:49:00.000-07:00

Hose Me Down Babe. PEEPING TOM!! My Dream Dude??

Well well. Long time since I blogged about the happenings of my life. Haha!! Yes people!!!! I have come to fulfill your cravings once again!! =P Just kiddin'.Haha!

I seriously don't know where to start. Let me try to remember as far as I can....

I had been spending lots of time around Farrer Park area. Mainly because my darling Kohila stays there!! We had another gathering..And Hatta, Pam and I went down to buy coke and mentos. [dammit.i don't even know how to spell that!] Did you know?? These 2 actually cause an explosive reaction?? *evil glint!* We went off to buy..Then we went up again. Pam just scooted off back to them!! So Hatta told me...

Hatta: Gurl. We go down..Then we go up from the other side and we surprise them!!

Me: Okay!!!

So we bent down and ran to the lift...Went down..And ran to the other side..Put in the mentos. Without knowing..Once we put it in..It could not explode again! So..Hatta was enjoying the explosion himself, while I stood there trying not to get any coke on me. However eventually, I still did! Got hosed down in lime coke and mentos!! Haha! I was tastaye!! Then we were dancing while the water hose sprayed on us. Neighbours who came down for a walk went off. Sorry!! After that, I went home wet! Luckily Hatta took a cab. And I hitched a ride from him. And I owe him a meal now. Haha!

Then went to Kohila's house again for her birthday party. Did not get wet this time!! I went to meet Pam first then went to get her gift..Walked around.Went to Pam's house....Then to Kohila's house in a cab....

We got out of the lift....

Me: Heyy!!! Darling!!!

Ko: Darling!!! *hugs* You look HHHOOTTT!!

Me: Haha! Thanks!!

Ko: Come! Let me introduce you....This is..blah blah..And this is....

Me: Uh-huh.Uh-huh. Hi! Uh-huh. :) [thinking: LIKE I WILL REMEMBER!]

We went to eat..and Hatta still did not come. So I went to try on the dress that Kohila wants to sell to me. It looks good!! And that stupid woman still didn't send me the pictures yet...Oh well. And a scenrio happened. Well, I was changing out of the dress. And Pam let Kohila's brother into the room!!! I WILL KILL YOU PAM!!!!!!!

Pam: I'm opening the door!

Me: What?! *quickly hid behind the study chair*

Ko's bro: *coming in!* OH GOSH! I'm so sorry!

So he goes out.

1 second later.

Comes back in with his back to me, and runs out.

Me: PAM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Pam: I told you I was opening the door!!!

Me: But I did not agree to it!!

Pam: You should have thrown on your top!!

Me: Thanks!

Pam: Sorry, dear....

Me: Humph.

In the end, Pam wanted to go for a walk. So we went out...Walking walking. Then...

Pam: Why are people staring? Do I look weird?

Me: No. :)

Pam: Hmm. Maybe they are staring because I'm holding your hand. A girl like you...a lesbian. So wasted.

Me: Hmm!! Like that better mah. Zaw should be thanking you for keeping me safe! At least guys will banish all hopes!!

Pam: Yea lah. Someone so sexy...Skirt so short.

Me: Eh!! It's not that bad okay?? It doesn't fly up!

Pam: Wanna try?????

Me: Nope! It's okay!

As we were walking around looking for MacDonald's...It rained! And Pam was protecting her eyes because her eye makeup is not waterproof. Haha! And we took a cab down to the nearest MacDonald's. Eventually, Hatta smsed me and met us there.

Had some fun in the party. With Kohila's FUNNY friends. Haha! I was laughing to no end. But sadly, there was no dance floor!!

Hatta, Pam and I went home in the MRT and talked talked talked.

Then Pam's stop came. So off she went.

Then Hatta and I were walking back.

Me: I wanna go clubbing.

Hatta: Huh?? You don't go clubbing one ah??

Me: Nope!! I'm a good girl kay?? Never went before..Supposed to..But my bf don't allow.

Hatta: Like that then you listen??

Me: :)

Hatta: I see a girl like you. So..Whoo!! And don't go clubbing??

Me: No lah. I don't want my bf to feel insecure also mah.

Sigh. I am just so proud of myself! For once I actually consider another's feelings!

My mom & I were talking bout what kinda guy she thinks I must have..[again]

Mom: His ego must be big.

Me: Yes, mom...

Mom: Bigger than yours!! So far, all the guys seem to be hopeless.

Me: Tell me bout it!! The record was...2hrs. I was sick of the guy in 2hrs.

Mom: Yea.You must have someone who is able to tame you, control you. If not you will step all over him, and get bored of him.

Me: True true. Don't worry. I found a guy whose ego is MUCH bigger than mine. I was quite shocked to find a guy like that.

Mom: Really?? What around the rest?? Last time..the old potential ones??

Me: Those are gone case!! Haha! Now this one, really can.

Mom: We shall see lah huh?? At 19 then you talk about getting serious.

I think I already am serious. And I'm only 17. :)

2006-09-11T09:20:00.000-07:00

Long time since I last blogged. And this new entry will be to someone..whom I really owe an apology to - a BIG apology. SO IF YOU KNOW I DON'T OWE YOU A BIG APOLOGY, DON'T READ ON!!

The truth is; I gave up on you. I waited 3-4 years for you, just to see you. Which is something I could easily get from other guys. I really doubt that I really loved you - I think it was more out of curiousity. If I really ever loved you, I would have continued waiting. No matter how stupid it may seem. Everyone had warned me that you were a fake, and by the looks of it, you are. There is nothing really genuine about you, is there? I turned down others for a faker. I thought I loved you. But I figured I only used you to be able to know how to act like I love. So I owe you a thank you too.

I put myself in the position of - what if I did meet you? Would I still wanna be with you? And the answer is - No. I would be bored of you, just like any other guy. And to make matters worse, you lie to the core. Everything you say is a lie. Despite I knew that it was all bullshit, I tried to make myself believe you; and convince my friends you are not as big a liar as you are.

Then I guess God came to my rescue - he sent another guy, Zaw. And for Zaw, I seriously didn't expect it to work out. And to further make sure it won't work out, I juggled you along. Which was very wrong of me. But after about, 1-2 days, I couldn't do it anymore. So I told you that I'm through with you. Ever since then, I felt happier. I had no regrets - I'm sorry. I meet him more often than others, he is not exactly what I had in mind of my ideal boyfriend - but I love him. That makes it more than enough. I don't mind meeting him either, while last time I made every excuse just to escape dates.

I'm really sorry if I made you feel like I ever really did love you. And thank you for letting me learn how to act like I am in love.

You take care alrite? And, like you said, stop contacting me. It will be better for the both of us; you can move on, and I can continue with Zaw.

P.S. there is such thing as love, you almost had it - if only you showed up.

2006-08-21T07:29:00.000-07:00

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME!!

haha! i know i'm like..really late for this entry.haha!! my birthday was on 17th.but anyways.better late than never! :)

this year...it was basically not really good.but i guess stuff like that happen as one grows older.it wasnt really good because of my mom actually...other than that.all you girls and my other parts of the family were really cool!!

to STC babes [including the teachers...]:
thanks SSSSOOOOO much for all the gifts!! i looked like a little kid..[as zaw said] walking in town with that big soft toy and balloon sticking out of the bag. XD and had a great hugging and kissing time! hahaha! thanks for all the greetings+hugging+kissing.

to my family:
love you guys just so much! thanks for being there... :) you all mean so so much to me!!!

to other friends:
LOVE YOU GUYS!!!

well.i dont really wanna talk much bout my mom.....

lets get on with the day! on the 17th.....i met caterina at the c'wealth mrt.and we took a cab to school.tipped the driver with the change.and made our way up to the hard court.it was the first time ever i was in school at 6.50am!!! THAT IS USUALLY THE TIME IM AT THE BUS STOP!!!

then.went to the foyer.got a few greetings.i left my prezzies by my bag during exam.and during which..the teachers molested my soft toy dog.and played around with my personalized balloon given by ash.hahahaha!! my dog was actually concluded to be a boy during assembly..but during exams, mr seow put toilet paper ribbons on it's ears and tail.anyways! i named it 'Paw'. heh heh!!

then i waited in the foyer.to get other prezzies.then sat there....chatted..hugged..greeted..with my friends.and made new friends......hahahahaha!

"oh! its your birthday!! happy birthday!! gerry rite?? geraldine..."

"yup. thanks! :)"

and made new friends!!!!

after that.i went to have lunch with geetz!! i love that girl so much! hahaha! we went to grillers at tiong..and talked bout life.went to burger king to have an ice cream.and she went to meet her momsy! while i...went to town to see my baby.

when he saw me...."you look like a little kid lah! carrying that soft toy..."

and he laughed.carried my bag.and to my surprise...i saw his friends!! it was so not planned.cant really say much bout them.

i quickly left though.didnt really feel comfortable with them.

and that idiot...[my baby] still wanted a kiss.so.i gave it!! his friends saw it...i felt even worse! so i quickly turned and walked off to meet kath.hahahaha!

then after that.i waited like..almost forever!! for her to finish deco-ing her neoprint with her friends.then..she took one with me.we went back to my home...

me: kays kath! im out of the shower!!!

kath: [on the com] okay!!

me: wad do you think i should wear.....this..this..or this...or this!..or...

kath: THIS! [pointing to one]

me: sure.....okay.

-came back after changing-

me: how do i look??

kath: this is not the one i chose! and it was none of the options!!!

me: well.i feel like wearing it now....how do i look??

kath: good.

me: do i look fat??

kath: no.

me: a little?? the tummy...

kath: no.

me: does my hair look fine?

kath: yes...

me: then...does..

kath: LETS GO!!!

and then went to lido.to have my family dinner!!

grandpa: you have grown up already! so pretty...when you finally bring back a serious bf.i must take a good look at him!!

me: haha!!!

grandma: haiya! this girl....so young.you think she will get a serious bf yet?!

me: HAHA!!! ^ ^"

and as usual.we went to take pics in the toilet.

kath you liar! i got tummy fat in this pic!! but i love it.. :)

comfy huh.

muah babes!!

toilet ad.

hold me.

down baby girl.

bring it up slowly.......

breathe on me......

went back to the dinner room.

sip it in.

private scandal in the VIP room. =P

COUSIN SHOES!!

oops!

oh my gosh!!

LOVE!!!

kiss kiss

candidly spastic

loved the wine.

yum.

glorious.

then.friday was spent with marilyn.the photos are not sent yet!!!! this girl ah....hahaha! but oh well.

sunday was with ker ker.we went to study first.when i boarded the bus....she was gonna board the same bus later.

i msged her.

"darling ah.i think you gotta sit your own seat.its quite crowded."

she replied.

"you alight at my house loh.then we take another bus.its faster and the stop nearer."

i replied.

"okay.can..."

then i msged her again.

"DARLING! the girl next to me...is alighting! so you can come up.somemore im lazy...."

she replied.

"pig.okay!!! i shall go up later!"

then the girl did not alight!!! cheated my feelings!!!!

so i msged her again.

"erm.i think i will alight.the girl did not alight...CHEAT MY FEELINGS OKAY?!?!"

she replied.

"grrr.im sitting on the bus stop."

hahahahaha!

we walked around...thinking of where we wanna sit down..eat..and study.finally we settled on burger king! oh btw.we were at marina square.haha!

studied studied...shared mp3 because this girl forgot to charge her batteries!!!

then watched CLICK! nice show.so touching...well.i cried.haha!

then we went walking around.

we took couple shots..hahahah!

look at the view!!

opposites.

gotta take time to think bout things.but sometimes..i take too much time.that i lose it.

we went walking......yea i look like....nvm.

besties.

finally...we got to....

COFFEE BEAN!!!

we shared this.hahaha! obviously..we were not hungry.

as much as i dont really like this pic....haha! she captured it :)

take away the salad.she lookds like she is studying.haha!

and i was eating.....haha!

although i did not take pics with a lot of pple....but i remember you guys! yup. :)

thanks you guys.

2006-08-13T06:55:00.000-07:00

My sick days were spent....PHONE SCOUTING!!

Well, my weekend was spent like this.....

On saturday.met my baby.then we went to sell a phone.walked around looking for the highest offered price.haha! in heels!! damn.it hurt so much...

On sunday.which is..TODAY! hahaha! well.i spent my day pretty much at home.blowing my nose.and sleeping.then..i met ker for dinner.we went to eat yoshinoya at harbourfront.den i observed this...guy/girl.i didnt know which!den ker was getting quite irritated.hahaha.

finally.we finished...

ker: darling.im so bored.....

sim: okay.we walk around..let our food digest digest k??

so we went walking around.into almost every store...then.finally..our last stop..BIG!!

me: darling.which phone should i get.....

ker: hmm..

salesguy: hi.may i help you?

me: just looking for a phone.....

then suddenly we had 2 guys helping us.then more and more.haha! then the boss came...

boss: waa! why all the guys standing here?! in one spot!!! haha! so many handsome guys hor??

i continued looking around....and asking asking.

then one of the guys asked....

guy: how old are you?

me: erm.19.

ker: O_O

guy: oh.i thought you were 21 or something...

me: haha! erm.well.im 19+...

ker: -.-!!

me: do you have any flyer or anything....for these phones?

guy: no..sorry.but i can call you or email you everything.

me: okay.email me.

so i wrote down my email.but not my hotmail one.

guy: okay.can i have your number? so i can call you when i email you...

me: erm.my phone is spoilt.so i dont have a number now.

guy: oh.okay.

me: yup.ok.thats it.thanks!

so ker and i went off.and we burst out laughing!!

me: i lied twice today!!!!!!!!

ker: yes i know!! i was so scared you will really give your number!

me: siao! i wanted to give one of our bf's numbers.=P

ker: then he will die!!

me: but one of guys quite cute lah.not so bad....

ker: hmm.no lah.i dont think any of them are really cute.

then.we took bus back together.and..thats my day!! mainly...haha.

2006-08-06T07:50:00.000-07:00

I am Dumb

I will update about the cast party when I get all the pictures from everyone all together. But basically, it was fun. I was pushed into the pool and went Clarke Quay with Sheila to meet Dinesh to have coffee. Went home around 11.

I had been quieter. Probably because I had been pondering - about the stupidest thing ever. About something which I don't have to even bother.

Falling in love is not my thing. I help people who are in love and get hurt. I have seen just how deadly and painful it could get. People cry for days...weeks just to get over that someone who probably never felt the same way you did. I never did the loving, I did more of the hurting. Which is a bad thing of course. I have stopped and started out trying to love. But the thing is, I did not think it would happen so badly. I always helped people because I thought I was able to see things for a 3rd person's point of view. There was once someone told me when I was helping her....

"Sometimes when you really fall in love. You are so caught in the middle, and somehow you don't mind getting hurt."

At that time, I thought it was really stupid. Don't mind getting hurt?! Who the hell wants to hurt themselves?? But now I finally understand. I am really scared actually. This is worse than stage fright!! At least on stage, things go according to script. Now I don't know what will go on. And I am not even sure if I should carry on. The longer I hold, the more I fall.

HELP ME!!

2006-07-30T06:23:00.000-07:00

MUSICAL BLUES!!!!

its just ONE week after musical.and im still feeling the pinch.

OUCH!

i miss my friends so so much....i realized just how much they mean to me.i saw them almost EVERYDAY! duh! i will miss them....the performances were simply magical.

we had our natural fears....

dinesh: hey! shitters!!!

gerry: hey! i-diot!!!!

dinesh: do you think we will still be friends after this....we are from different schools you know..

gerry: haha! maybe.

dinesh: SHITTERS!! you cannot say that!!!!!!

gerry: dont worry :) we will still be friends....hopefully.

dinesh: thanks shitters. that was so encouraging! *hugs*

then...thivya almost killed me.

gerry: do you think we will still be friends?

thiv: [on the verge of tears] gerry..i will stab you.

the first show [friday matinee]was....well.generally good.it was decent.

the second show [friday night]....not as good.

the third show [saturday matinee].....was TERRIBLE.

the forth show [gala night].....was PERFECTLY MAGICAL!!!

GALA.
we went thru the same routine. got into character before the entrance with kohila.closed my eyes...haha! convinced myself i was no longer Geraldine!! and the boy Surin..the hot..guitarist of the village! muahaha!! then when it was time to enter....our hearts paced.we hugged each other and exchanged eyes of excitement and fear.our feets went down the steps swiftly and carefully..as the microphone stuck on my face began to feel uncomfortable.i did not dare to look at anyone for fear that i would lose my character.i hardly ever acted as a boy before..so it was a character i had to focus to keep.i leaped onto the stage and danced.

my movements had to be Surin. it was quite scary as i almost forgot who i was.there was once i was acting in a show..and i completely lost myself in the character i did not even rocognize my own mother when she came to see me during interval.

soon.it was The City scene.i had to change into a bar top slut.like some transexual.in a split second.the hair guy..i call him Ching Chang.i quickly changed..the first few shows,my friends helped.but then..stacey helped me and i stripped completely.i ran in heels to Ching Chang.who clipped on the fake horse hair..while i looked at myself in the mirror.when i realized why my dancing was never able to hit 10/10.but only 8/10.."which character am i gonna be?? who is this bar top girl??" so i quickly scanned thru my head..

im NycoleBelle. this bar top girl is "Nycole".the sluttiest girl in the entertainment industry.money is all on her mind and men are just her baits.sex is absolutely nothing to her but a tool to make money.her body is for show, enjoyment and pleasure.

then my mind screamed. BUT WHAT ABOUT THOSE PEOPLE OUT THERE WATCHING YOU?! WHAT ABOUT YOUR REPUTATION?!

but i knew.on stage..i am no longer myself.those people came to see me be someone else and to be entertained.not see me be someone ordinary.

my heels whisked to the wings of the stage. as i stood there and everyone passed encouraging looks. dinesh came to help me spunk my hair with ching chang.

dinesh: you look sooo hot.

gerry: :) thanks

then i knew. SHIT! THIS IS NOT NYCOLE! THIS IS CLEARLY GERALDINE! my cue to walk in came..i smiled slutfully.nycole had arrived.

i strutted in with seduction in my eyes.flirt in my movement.my feather boa was my flair of appeal.my glittering dress screamed attention.i swiftly made my way to the men and flirted big time. my head had a quick flashback of what happened before i entered to perform....

gurpreet: oh! is he the one...always wear cap.......and has a chinese gf in sch??

gerry: wad?!

gurpreet: yea...in rp.

kohila: [taking advantage of the situation] yea.geraldine! you slut!! the other chinese girl must be better than you....look at how you dance! you are so bloody cheap!!

my anger..seduction..and competitive spirit arose.as my heels made their way up the crates..i danced like a true slut.i was no longer Geraldine..i was Nycole.

then.i had to change back into Surin in 10mins to make an entrance in the market scene.i slowly changed as i looked in the mirror.i thanked Nycole and welcomed Surin.my movements changed again, my expressions were different.Surin loves the market. :)

slowly.the rest of the scenes finished off.and i entered for another scene..the curtain call.after the entire dancing..dinesh ran to hug me.and my mom saw!!!!!!!!!! well.then we packed up.i helped move stuff into the lorry.in my heels...haha! i convinced my mom to let me help and i would go home alone.i knew i would miss the production..i meant almost everything to me.

SIGH!

oh.gratitude to olivia and nancy.when i forgot to bring my school shoes on saturday.nancy for her socks..olivia for her shoes. HAHA

here are some pics in my musical days....those not posted in the previous entries.

miss you all so so much!!!

backstage.taken by stanley.

the dudes with one of our 'gf's.haha!

ateeqah's birthday!! candid shot

yumm! its good................

THE CAST!

the Men with Mrs Kong.

Nycole.

DON'T CHA!!

HAPPIE BLESSED BDAY EEQAH!

Hot guys in town.yea..i look chubby!!!!

thanks Ed!!

i love you girls simply so much

thanks for all the help with the mircophone!!! he took extra care with those tapes on my face! :D

the food was...edible. :) the company was irreplaceable.

Dinesh!! as Mr Jialat!!! hahaha

thanks for all the support!

one more show to go!!

sigh.if only i could turn back time.

i know i look horrible! haha! i was sleeping......=P

when i first tried on the costume!!

THE CAST OF SING TO THE DAWN!!!

sigh. all good times gotta coem to an end.

oh..and in case any of you are still wondering.gurpreet got the wrong person.haha! he is not cheating on me...at least i think not.

ciao!

2006-07-09T07:39:00.000-07:00

We Share A Connection

my basic plan of the day - go to dolly's mom's makeup demo.

but in the morning..i was called over to meet sally with my mom.sally..my stepdad's student.well, one of them.she needs help with her english hmk.so i went over..but i didn't do anything.i just went there..and i went walking around.at far east plaza..at 11am!! who does that?! hardly any shops were open yet! but i quite enjoyed it...there was hardly anyone! and the shops that were open..i quite liked them.and i popped into one of the shops that i actually found something i liked for a long time already.and i found it again!!!!!!

shop owner: you are finally back!! you didnt come for such a long time.i thought you werent coming back

me: omg! you actually remember me??

shop owner: yes i know you were eyeing on this! and you promised me you would come back!! and i know you liked this top with this jacket!

me: ......

i was speechless!! haha!

den i bought the top first. but not the jacket. i walked around a while more....and went back.

me: aunty! give me that jacket too!!

so..obviously.im fickle.

then..i went back to my house market with my mom. and had a drink with my gramps..and my mom. then took a train down to outram. IT WAS FREAKY!!

well.as usual..i needed the toilet. so i walked to pearl's centre. and this woman from one of the facial shops..PULLED ME INTO HER SHOP!! and she kept on telling me....

lady: you see your face..you are already very pretty.if you go for this..and your face becomes clean.it will be so much better! all this was spoken in chinese!

me: oh..izzit.

lady: go for the facial! its only $28 for the first 100 customers.

me: oh really....

lady: yes.do it do it.

me: erm.well..my friend is coming too.so why don't i bring her along later? and this way you can get 2 customers!

lady: why don't you do it first?? then you can show your friend how good it is..

me: no lah! as a friend..if i do it first.she will scold me! tell you what..why don't you write your name on this flyer.and when i come back..i will ask for you.

lady: okay!!

so, after writing her name.i quickly made my exit.and to the toilet.well! i couldn't even poo in peace!! there was construction going on!!

i quickly scooted back to the mrt.it was safer.

finally met up with dolly and nancy. then we walked to her mom's shop. it has this nice..future..warm..clean feeling.i like it!

dolly's mom: your friend ah?? hmm!! when i see you..i get a feeling that i already want to be your makeup artist! you are very pretty already..but if you took better care of your face..you will be so much better!!

and she uses neways!! FINALLY SOMEONE!! =D

made friends with the photographer.john.he has long hair! does all photographers have LONG hair?! and yen.the other guy.he called me over to the laptop..and showed me lots of stuff.

then.we went walking in chinatown..i saw this pair of sunglasses!!!

me: omg..its so freaking nice...

dolly: yea! the butterfly is very nice.

nancy: you look gorgeous in it!!

salesboy: miss..you are very pretty...

AT THAT MOMENT! I WAS SO TURNED OFF!!

me: thanks...

salesboy: can i know your name?

me: erm.nycole.

I'M NOT REALLY LYING!! its supposed to be my baptism name...

after that...i quickly left! i'm supposed to be faithful..and if i continued staying even after knowing he was hitting on me...i would be off track.

then..i went walking around.AND I WAS THINKING OF THOSE SUNGLASSES!!!

so i went back.....

me: oh! he is not there! its another guy!!!

but once i got there..his friend called him over.and he came back.

DAMMIT

salesboy: hi nycole.you came back..

me: how much is this?

salesboy: $12

me: can i have it for $10?

salesboy: anything for you nycole.

I SHOULD HAVE SAID $0!!

well.anyway.i got it!! wahahahaha!!!!!

then we went walking a bit more..and i took a bus home. i was sweating like crazy!!!! in the bus i was still drooling over my new wallet. haha!! I LOVE IT SO MUCH!! i still remember how i bought it...i was with my musical peeps..

me: see this?? i wanna buy this one...there is black..blue and silver....which one do you think i should get?

geetz: hmm! the black is nice...

thiv: blue is not nice.

aunty: girl.there is another colour...here.

[my back was facing her]

ko: oh! its nice...

thiv: yup!!

[i turned]

me:OMG!!! OKOK!! YES YES!! I WANT IT!!!

geetz: haha! its so 'geraldine'!!

aunty: okay.i will show you the design inside...

me: no its okay! i don't care! i just want it...

thiv&geetz&ko&fat: O_O!!!!!!

then after that..the rest all went back.ko and i had dinner together in macs.we talked & yakked.

me: do you know..they actually say...how one chooses stuff like..wallet..handphone..personal stuff.its how they choose their partners.

ko: so true! you look so much on the outside!! you fall in love at first sight...and don't even look at the designs inside! you change your wallet every 6 months?? even though its not spoilt...just because another one catches your eye.

me: dangerous huh....

ko: what about zaw?

me: i don't know what the hell is wrong with him. he is like..i don't even know if he really cares and loves me.i'm like...THIS CLOSE..to breaking up.but everytime i want to break up...i just cant!! i was actually using him to fulfill the 2months bet..and to get the feel of loving for my acting.its not in my agenda to fall in love with him..and i'm trying not to.but i am ko!!! i can tell you...i love him! he annoys the hell out of me! he pisses me off!! he hurts me like shit!! but i'm not leaving him!!!

ko: :)

okay.that was on another day!! haha!!!!

BACK TO SATURDAY!!

then..finally! ajay told me it was him that was chatting online.i SUCK at linking email addresses and people together!

he called me again.haha! after not talking for 2months...he said he misses me and he didn't mean whatever he said that time.well..whatever.once bitten twice shy.

he said he promises to call me at least once a week or month. haha! like that will affect me anymore....it used to..but now..its just different.i sorta gave up on him.

k.thats it.

2006-07-09T07:06:00.000-07:00

Musical RRRAAAWWWWWKKKKSSSSS!!!!!!!!!!

i love my musical peeps!!! they totally rock my world! everytime i go to school...i only look forward to seeing them!! I'M IN LOVE WITH THEM!! they make me happy when i'm down..and they will listen to me.unlike *some* people.....they just have the status in my life..but they don't really give a damn.

anyways.enough about the bad bad thingys.this entry is supposed to be for..FRIDAY!! 7th july 2006!!

in the morning...shah met me in the morning at the bus stop. felt kinda awkward..and last time i wont really want to meet him because i feel like i'm being unfaithful in some way.and he won't like it.but he acts like he doesn't even care about my life & how i feel.and i really feel like giving up.....

OH WELL!

then.i quickly smsed thivya to meet me at the bus stop.

we went to perform for Radin Mas Primary. they came to my school..and they were so cute!!!!! but.....

HORRIBLE AUDIENCE!

here are some things they said.....

"you got bf??"

"you are a gangster!!!!! show me your tatoo!!"

then it went on to class. we skipped PE.those who performed..and we were so SHAGGED!! lessons were laggy too..nothing much.i slept during last period..then went to change.after that..went for rehearsal!! and we took some photos!

this was taken in the canteen.

OH! SCANDALOUS!!!

up the ladder at backstage!!

thivya & her smile.haha! so standard!!

geetz!!

my dah-ling!!

din din!! totally totally totally!

more geetz...

taken after our dancing!

i was supposed to meet zaw after that.but seriously no time..and..nvm.kaes.that just about sums up friday.

2006-07-02T03:55:00.000-07:00

You Haunt My Dreams

I took a nap in the afternoon, like 1.30-6.20.

And I had a dream.

I dreamt that I was in this dark hotel. With my family for a vacation. Then, I had my own room. I had to sleep by myself. The room number was 909. Once I stepped into it, I felt horrible. Then one of the room service boys helped my luggage in. I went out to my family and told them that I cannot sleep in that room; its dirty. The boy told the hotel people that I could not, it was supposed to be a forbidden room. But they said they had a full house, so I had to take that room. Then the boy took care of me and we kissed, I loved him. He told me to go to his room at night, I would sleep in his room, his room was number 908. When I did, I found another girl in his room, but sleeping on another bed, yet calling him 'honey'. So I went out, he ran after me. But I did not want to turn back. I went shopping, and wound up in a bookstore. I was looking frantically and hopefully for a book, but I never found it.

So I went to translate the dream......with my dream dictionary.

Basically..it means...

Being in the hotel --> I am in a relationship or situation that I subconsciously note that it will only be temporary and it cannot last forever.

Room number 909 & 908 --> If its a relationship, this bf now is number 9. And I am hoping that he would be like number 8.

Service Boy --> According to the dictionary, he should be my bf or someone very close. He is used to escape from my loneliness and fears. And he proves to be enough for me to love. Then I really fall in love with him.

Running away from him, because I saw the girl --> But he can never be like number 8. He does not help me, and I feel insecure, thus I give up.

Shopping --> Trying to fill up my insecurity.

Looking for books --> Scared that part of my past would become 'published' and the world would know.

This dream seems to uncover a lot.

I feel insecure..thats true. I'm scared that he finds out my past..true. I used him at first to get rid of my loneliness, but slowly I fell in love with him..true. I sometimes really hope that he could like my ex, because I know my ex really does love me, but I feel that he doesn't..true.

Damn. I feel so emotional right now. Haha!

2006-07-01T21:07:00.000-07:00

A PACKED DAY!!! Should I call it off?

Actually,this entry is supposed to be yesterday. Haha! But I was so tired..No energy..

The day started off with waking up at 6.15am. To meet Ash to get tickets for SYF. And get ready for recording! I woke up..bathed..changed..did some warm-up on my vocals. But it didn't exactly work out.....So I decided to leave that to Sarah [my music director].

I couldn't really decide what to wear..So I just slipped on whatever my eyes laid themselves on. Haha! Which was basically a pair of jeans..Black spag..White vest..Gold pearl necklace..Gold bag..and heels!! Anyways, enough about that chatter chatter. On with the day...

My day's programme was FILLED! Here is a brief intro...

8.00-8.05 --> collect tickets from Ash
8.05-8.20 --> go down to Outram Park MRT
8.20-8.30 --> meet up with my the other 4 recording people & miss lee
8.30-9.00 --> vocal warmups
9.00-1.30 --> recording
1.30-3.00 --> doing my hair!!
3.00-3.15 --> meet Dinesh in a cab
3.15-4.00 --> get to the stadium
4.00-7.00 --> SYF!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Okay..Now that I typed it out.Doesn't seem so packed...Maybe its just my low amount of stamina. Well..into detail now!

I arrived at the MRT when Shah called me.

Shah: Hello, Geraldine? Where are you?

Me: Oh.Hi Shah. Em..I'm at our house MRT already.

Shah: So early?? I was thinking we could meet up...and go down together.

Me: Sorry. I'm meeting someone earlier to collect some stuff...I'll see ya there. Bye!

Short & Sweet.

Then, Ash smsed me. I found out that we were on the same train!!!! Haha!! "So near, yet so far." Quoted from Ash.

Then, Tiong Bahru came. I alighted..and looked around for Ash. She gawped at me. Haha!! And we hugged! I miss her!!

Ash: OMG! You are so hot!!!

Me: Haha! Thanks..You look cute!

Ash: Here are the tickets!! I hope I can see you later...

Me: Yup! Me too. :) Alrite. I better get going..I'm going for recording.

So we parted.

Arrived at Outram Park. Went up..and there was no one there! I took a glimpse at my hp's time....8.12am. I thought to myself, "Dammit. I'm early! And no one is here to see this rare occasion..."

Then..About 1minute later, Shah came up.

Shah: For a minute. I saw you, and I was like.. 'Who is this girl??' And I realised its you.

Me: Am I that hard to recognize??

Shah: Its no wonder you have 11bfs last time....Look at you!

Me: Ahem! 11 is including kindergarten..I only have 8 so-called..proper ones.

Shah: Geraldine....You are so hot......

I almost freaked out. I don't know..it was the way he looked at me and said it. Haha!!!!

And then, we went to sit down. So I loaned Shah my mp3...

Finally, Zhi Hui and Steph came.

Shah: Steph! You look hot!

Steph: Thanks!! Geraldine!!! You look so nice!!!!!!!!!!!!

Me: Haha! Thanks...

Then Ann arrived.

We waited for Miss Lee...until 8.45am!!! I was getting quite pissed. She is always late! And I was tempted to just get a cab down there. Then, we saw Mr.VideoMan. I forgot his name..but he is one of my school's IT teachers. And he was there to video and take photos of us while recording. And eventually, I found out that Miss Lee was in an accident. I felt so guilty for getting pissed at her....Then she came..And we went off in 2cabs.

Finally, we reached the place. A little late.

It was cool! And the technology there was.....UNBELIEVEABLE!!! Well.It is quite...But you should see how he could just adjust here and there. Haha!

We had some warm-ups. And my vocals..felt a little shaken up. A little.

Then, it was a group recording first. Shah, Steph and I. However, they decided to make it individual. I was so nervous..I visited the toilet 3 times in 30mins. You would have thought "No wonder Singapore does not have enough water. Its all consumed by Geraldine." I don't even know how I got so much water in my body....

Then, after Shah, they wanted to use me.

Sarah: You ready?

Me: Can I go to the toilet first?

WenFu: Haha!!! We use Zhi Hui first lah. Save time.

So, make that 4 times in 32 mins.

Then, it got to my first recording. The "First Beginnings Song". So I sang....and WenFu talked to me while I was in the recording room.

WenFu: I like your voice. It has personality. But you are nervous..Relax...

So I sang the whole song...

Jason: Okay, Geraldine. That was very good. You can come out now.

Then I stepped out..

Steph: Geraldine...Your voice is so nice lah.

Shah: Yea! I was cursing you while you were inside!! You got all the notes right! You did everything in just 3 takes! I took don't know how many!!! You have a very radio-friendly voice...

Ann: Yup.It was very good.

Me: *blush!*

I'm a shy person okay??

Then the 2nd taking. "Market Calls" song.

I forgot my lyrics. Because these 2 songs are similar in melody!! So..Jason took out 2 stands for me to spread out the scores.

Then, he spoke to me while I was in the room.

Jason: Now you got the scores..No mistakes!!!

TENSION!!

WenFu: Haha! Don't scare her!!

Jason: Haha! Kidding kidding!! Just sing.

So I sang..I finished in about 4-5 takes.

Jason: Alrite. You can come out now, Geraldine. Well done.

Me: Okay. Thanks.

But I still felt that I did not do my best. So I asked Zhi Hui.

Me: Just now when I was singing..How was it?

ZhiHui: Good what!!

Me: What did Sarah, WenFu and Jason say?

ZhiHui: Oh..They say your voice very nice. Like some famous singer...Got personality and style. What they say about me??

Me: Haha! They say you very cute!!!

Then, I left earlier. Took a cab down to Toa Payoh. I got there earlier than my appointment timing. But I was in a rush anyways! I was there at 1.30, got attended to at 1.45.

And I finished at around...3?

Went to get a cab. And got onto a really old old one. Worried that I would hurt the driver's feelings, I smsed Dinesh. "I'm in a yellow-top OLD cab. You won't miss it."

Then Dinesh called me..

Din: GERRY! How do I get to the taxi stand??

So I had to help him. And this guy is quite blind...Haha!! Then when the taxi got there..I saw this guy who looks like him..

Me: Are you wearing a orange cap??

Din: Am I? Oh yes! I am..Haha!!

Then he got into the cab. And we were on our way to the stadium!!

Din: I thought your bf was supposed to be coming with you??

Me: He has no interest in such stuff. Thanks for coming.

Din: No problem :)

And we chatted and laughed in the cab. I think the driver got quite annoyed. Haha!!

Then I was like...Telling him about Shah.

Me: Do you think I'm thinking too much?

Din: Yes you are! Haha!! But honestly, you are a pretty girl. Honestly, you are. And guys will be after you...

Me: Fathima said I should go talk to him.

Din: I think that Shah is still young!!

Haha!! I guess that is quite true.....Then we got there. I tipped the driver...

Driver: That will be $8.70.

Me: Okay. [gave him $10] Charge me $9.

Din: O_O

Me: It's only 30cents. I don't like coins.

So we got off the cab..Dinesh stook out his hand.

Din: So, Geraldine. Lets go!

Haha! This guy is full of nonsense. And we were so scared of losing each other in the crowd..

Din: So many people!! I thought there will only be a few of us....

Me: Asshole-e. You think they will rent the entire stadium just for a few of us??

So we held hands just to make sure we stuck together. Then Geetha spotted me. And she came running to me, said hi and told me where she was sitting. And agreed to meet after that. Then we smsed each other...
=BEEP!=
Geet: I thought you were with Zaw!!
=BEEP!=
Me: Naah. He doesn't like such things....

Then my phone's reception died. So we smsed thru Dinesh's phone. And she thought I was Dinesh.

=BEEP!=
Me: I'm so hungry! I wanna eat!!! I may leave earlier...
=BEEP!=
Geet: There are stores downstairs. Go there and buy lah!
=BEEP!=
Me: I'm so lazy!!
=BEEP!=
Geet: You pig!!! Lazy!!

So I showed it to Dinesh. And he took the phone...
=BEEP!=
Din: You talking about Gerry or me??
=BEEP!=
Geet: YOU!!!!!!
=BEEP!=
Din: But just now smsing was Gerry!!!!!!!!!
=BEEP!=
Geet: HAHAHA!! Don't come and bluff me!!!

And then, Dinesh gave up. Haha!! Throughout the whole SYF..we quite had fun. We were the only cheering people in the area.

In the beginning......

Me: This is quite boring.................

Din: Where are the venders?? You said they will be walking around!!

Me: Yea! They do!!!

In the middle.........

Me: Okay. Quite exciting...

Din: WHERE ARE THE VENDERS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Towards the ending......

Me: OOH! Look at that! I'm glad we didn't leave!!!!!!!

Din: Totally.Totally.Totally.Now.WHERE ARE THE BLOODY VENDERS!!!!!!

To the ending.........

Me: Okay. Looks like the venders won't be coming...

Din: I will smack you.....

I am so proud of my school girls!!! They totally rawked!! LOVE YOU ALL!

Then.Geet and I had some communication breakdown! I thought she was not having dinner with me. But actually she was!! And I went off with Dinesh to Kallang MRT. Then..Dinesh and I took seperate trains..We hugged and went off. Then I went to Tiong Bahru, bought MacDonalds home and ate. Haha!! Poor Ash & Cat only got home so much later..

Okay! That was my day!!!

2006-06-28T07:36:00.000-07:00

My First Shopping Trip with Geetha! And..He held my hand and touched my skin.

I promised Geetha I would blog about our shopping trip. Which was yesterday!! So...here goes!

The day started off really...well. I couldn't wait for it to end! I was supposed to be in school at 7am for singing rehearsal. But I arrived in school at 7.27am. I wanted to take a cab to school...however! TWO *toots!!* stole my cab! They just went in front of me...And took them away....So I took a bus!! Thank God I still arrived on time!!

In class, Kohila and I were crazy! Again...Haha!! And I found Geetha!!

Me: Geetha!! Later can we go to Marina Square instead??

Geet: Yea sure!!

Me: Really?! I thought you will say I'm crazy. Haha!! Thank you!!

Eventually, Kohila changed the plan!

Ko: I told Geetha already. And she said okay.

Me: Okay to what??

Ko: Since we end 1 period earlier than them, we go first. Take a train down with me, to meet Sound. Then, we take a train to Tiong. Geetha hops on, and we go Marina together. I need to go Esplanade, then later we come back to school together.

Well, I could not simply cancel everything again! If not Geetha would be so confused!! Then on the train..We were talking about Zaw.

Me: Zaw and I broke up last night.

Ko: Omg. You serious? But you seem okay.....You never loved him is it.

Me: No no. We broke up for 2 minutes. And now we are back again.

Ko: Geraldine! You suck!! What happened exactly...

Me: Well. I would say it's my fault. I said that..We won't last forever.

Ko: [on the verge of slapping me] GERALDINE!!!!!! I'm telling you!! I know you really love him! You better not screw this one!!!

Me: We broke up..like once before. For a short period of time.

Ko: Yea. I remember. And it was also your fault!

Me: Yea I know..And I cried.

Ko: I'm actually quite shocked. You..cried..? Not acting cry. I know you act very well to crying on the phone!!

Me: No..I REALLY cried. I don't know. I never really cry for guys before. But there is just something else about him..Seriously! My other bfs last time..Just call me 'idiot'. Thats it! I don't take it as a joke. I get irritated!!

Ko: You are really picky....

Me: No serious! I could just break up!! Just because of 'idiot'. Haha! But this one..He calls me that all the time! And I don't mind....

Obviously. There is something wrong with me!

Soon, when we were nearing Boon Lay. Sound calls to change the location. And I had to take the train back myself!! I waited for Geetha for like..almost forever!! Haha! Because the bus took forever to reach the MRT.

Once we got there, I found so many stuff!! I was like..OH OH OH!! And it was ADIOS to my $$$!!! I spent $50++++ in 1hr 30mins. Which is already good okay!! I found some stuff which I controlled myself not to splurge on! I almost spent $100++. But Geetha convinced me to look somewhere else to find better things. She is a good shopping companion. Haha! We had Burger King! And shared a sundae pie. And we chatted!! I honestly didn't know we could chat so much!! I'm tempted to make outings with her a regular thing! XD

We walked around....And talked..Bitched. And finally, Kohila called me! At 4! It was the time when we are supposed to go! And...I waited for her till I decided to just continue shopping. And because of her..I spent another $20!!! In 3 minutes. Haha! And finally she called me.I saw her with Sound.Finally! We left!! At 4.30!! Which was the time when we had to be in school!

When I arrived there, Shah gave me a...I don't know what look that is. Haha! And I just changed into my shirt and popped into the dance! Everything went pretty cool.

NOW! LETS GET TO..TODAY!!

Today..I found out that my mom cannot wake up on time! And I was running so late!! I actually wanted to be absent! But...I have musical training! Obviously, I could not make it again for morning singing! Lessons were normal.Nothing much.....Except during accounts. Kohila and I went to talk to another teacher. Well, chat. Haha! And we slipped into class..The teacher did not even realise!

During rehearsal. Thivya came to me..And told me about some bad happenings. And I felt so bad! They got into trouble just to buy me my club sandwich!! And we sat in the control room. Eating..The stage manager preferred us to stay in the audi anyways. Then.I recieved this really weird phone call.

Person: Hello??

Me: Hello? Who is this....

Person: *said something in an unknown language*

Me: Sorry...

Person: *repeats the same stuff*

So I hung up.

Then..called again!

Person: Hello?? Who is this????

Me: [thinking it was Sound, looking for Kohila] This is Geraldine....Sound is it?

Person: Geraldine eh....This is Sam! I live in Bishan. And want to get to know you..

Me: What the...

So I passed the phone to Fathima.

Fat: Oei! Who are you?? Call Geraldine for wad??? You got nothing better to do izzit???

And he refused to hang up!! So...Dinesh got into action!

Din: [in his low low..manly voice] Eh! Who are you?? Why are you calling Geraldine?? Hey! I have been dating her for 2 years okay!! Don't let me find you!!! We have been together for 2 years already! What nonsense are you talking about??

So that person hung up. And we all burst out laughing!!

Then....

Thiv: What is it was actually Dizaw's friend?? Just testing you....

Me: Oh shit. He will be furious!

Din: Uh oh. Like totally totally totally!!

So I called my honey. But none of his friends called. WHEW!

Then during full run, everything went pretty well. But someone was simply showing attitude all the time. People are hating her already! And she still doesn't get it into her bloody thick skull. Dinesh forgot his lines.And skipped an entire scene!! Haha!! This guy....forever like that. Then my bar girl dancing was...according to people. SIZZLIN' HOT!!! So..Good. Haha! But I still gotta improve it. Then Shah held my hand and pulled me to the side of the stage when we were getting ready for our new scene. His hand flicked too wildly around, I had to move. Haha! In the bus...He suggested we go some stuff.Since it could be the last period of time we see each other. I don't know what stuff! Do not ask me!!!

So, I got home. And I will be spending the night alone!! As usual....So..CIAO!

2006-06-26T07:10:00.000-07:00

First Day Of School!!!

I woke up late!! well.about 15mins late.I was just so lazy! I did not feel like going at all!!!! Because it was no longer going to school for rehearsal! It was more like..SCHOOL! But I was quite excited for Ash's pizza! Although we didn't manage to meet up.Haha! And my pizza got disgusting and soggy....Anyways....I got caught for my hair.

Miss Q : Geraldine. I'm not blind..your white became gold.

Marilyn: It's natural one!!

Melody: Yea! It's not dye!

Miss W: Okay.Okay. Ask your mom to write a letter.

My mom kinda foresaw it.Haha! She was practically getting ready for a phone call! She was like.."How come your teachers didn't call me??"

During first period, went to Miss W's class to get our new timetable. And Nat and I had a...constructive..conversation. Haha! If you wanna put it that way. Some people should know!

After that, got onto class. Kohila and I were bitching around..During Geog.Mrs C wanted us to help her wash her classroom and arrange the tables. Which was seriously...argh. And she picked me out to wash the towel and clean her desk.

Fang brought over a furry insect. Everyone evacuted the toilet. Kohila and I were left inside alone..grinding. Hahahahahaha!!!

During English, either Kohila and I were to go up and read for the class. And Nat volunteered too.

Ko: How? Which one of us....

Me: You go. Help me get some revenge.

Ko: Gladly darling!

Naturally, my darling won!! Haha! She read better...Well, to me at least. Maybe I am just bias. :D

Recess, there was no seat! However, as we stood there. A group of lower sec moved. Although it was quite dirty! I somehow miss my canteen food...Although it is not exactly.Good...Towards the end of recess, I met up with Mehreen, Nancy & Pamela at the drink stall. And we bitched. Then we walked a little, and got a little drama.

Me: I think I'm losing energy......

Nan & Pam: We shall catch you!! -runs to the sides of me-

Meh: I will be the one behind!!! -runs behind me!-

Me: I'm falling..Catch me!

Yea.Lame.I know.

Today, in Bio, it was sexual reproduction. And I fell asleep. Haha!!!!!! I don't know whats wrong with me!!

Lunchtime, Shah popped by my table. While I was with Ateeqah & Kohila. Then, more people came. I didn't really eat for lunch, just the oreo blended. Which Miss P told me, "It's disgusting."

Finally, it was rehearsal time. Well, today we just watched a video of our performance. I saw LOTS of funny funny scenes. At first, there was no sound. It was like a silent movie; just no subtitles. Then came my pole dancing scene.

Friends: WOO-HOO!!

Shah: There goes Geraldine! HOT!!

After I finished....

Ko: Geraldine! Not bad!! Sex-aye!! Yum~

Shah: *claps!!*

Friends: *claps!!*

Haha! I'm so shy......Haha!

Eventually, Kohila and I got bored. So I went to teach her the dance moves for the first dance. Then, we grinded in the control room. Mmm~ And before we left, we wanted to take some scandalous photos! Joshua took a few shots too!! And some other girls.....took shots as well. Haha!!

This pic so inspirational I think. Its like...Magic! Haha!!

Then on the bus home...I asked Shah..

Me: Am I too slutty for that dance already?

Shah: TOTALLY! Which is supposed to be your character anyways.

Me: Okay..But it is supposed to be Dania's scene right? I'm like..stealing her limelight.

Shah: Geraldine. In all the scenes in the video..As long as you are there, you steal the limelight. It's just you!

I'm so touched!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Alrite. Thats all for today! :)

2006-06-24T09:30:00.000-07:00

He SPED! stuck his middle finger!!!!!

HAHA! well.since I didn't update since thursday...Lemme try to recall....Well.Nothing much realli happened.Except I kept on asking ateeqah.."WHAT SHOULD I WEAR TMR?!" other than that..It was just normal rehearsal.

On friday.I did Thivya's nails....

Me: Okay.So you want french rite?

Thiv: Yup, Gerry!

Shah: Thivya. You actually trust Geraldine with your nails??

Thiv: Yea! She is good!!

Din: Geraldine...Can you like..Paint mine too??

Me: Dinesh. You are a guy...Or are you like..Somewhere in between...? =P

Din: [stupid face arises] Pwease?? Like..Totally totally totally!!

Me: I can help you do base coat....At the most!

Din: Are you si-ri-ous?? [serious in Dinesh's terms]

We had a full run! It was..let me put it nicely.Not up to our best? My men song is not exactly.."manly".The director said we still sound like girls.I mean..DUH WE SOUND LIKE GIRLS! BECAUSE WE ARE GIRLS?! But of course.We need to sound MANLY! I feel like a transexual!! Immediately after I sing my men song..I become a go-go bar girl! Then after that.A boy again.Its like..MAKE UP YOUR MIND IF YOU WANNA BE A BOY OR GIRL! Haha!!

Rehearsal delayed! Because we had lectures..Briefs about our performance.It delayed for about 2 hours!! Ateeqah & I were so freaking out! We wanted to have another friend joining us.Because Violet would just come and leave after a while.And we thought it was a waste of ticket.I tried getting Thivya...So she called her mom. I wasn't there to hear it though.She did it in the toilet and I had to stay where I was.But when she got back...

Thiv: My mom said cannot.

Me: Why?!?! Did you tell her its a ticket which no one could take?

Thiv: Yea.

Me: It's free??

Thiv: Yea.

Me: It is a school concert?? Perfectly decent???

Thiv: Yea.

Me: ..Dammit...

I then called Dinesh........The phone rang for what seemed to be..eons!

Din's mom: Hello?

Me: Erm.Hi. Could I speak to Dinesh please?

Din's mom: Oh.Hold on....

--SILENCE--

I did not realise...MY PHONE HAD DIED!!!

So he called me back while I was alighting from the bus.

Din: Why didn't you wait for me????

Me: My phone died...

Din: Yup Geraldine. I believe you. I believe you so much...

Me: Yea.I'm sure you do.Anyways, you wanna come to the concert tonite?

Din: Geraldine. I really really wanna go out with you....

Me: Don't make it sound like a date.

Din: But! I got studies to do!! I got O levels this year! And I hardly got any time thanks to the musical. If you told me yesterday. I would have planned my studying time better.

Me: Okay....Nevermind then.

Din: Wait! Are you going alone??

Me: Haha! No way!! Ateeqah is coming with me...

Din: Scare me! If you were alone..I would have gone for sure.

Me: Okay! Dinesh!! I'm going ALL ALONE!

Din: ..Geraldine..Bullshit.

Me: Haha! Okay lah.Go study. Take care alrite?

Din: Yea! I will. You take care too. And I think we should really go out one day. Like for dinner or something. And maybe a movie!

Me: Alrite.Bye!

After that.I RUSHED thru my dressing.I did not even have enough time to put on eyeliner.Not that I put often..But I just felt like wearing.Haha!!The concert was supposed to start at 6.I arrived at the MRT at 6.15.Haha! Late as usual.I met Violet first.Ateeqah came 5mins later.The concert was basically okay.But kinda boring...And some people kept on pushing around.Violet got so pissed off.Haha!Ateeqah was asking, "Why is Zaw calling you?? Doesn't he know you are at a concert?? Don't pester you lah!" Haha! During the concert.We moved forward & forward. Then this person next to me asked me...something..I could not make out if it's a guy or girl....

Person: Hi!

Me: :)

Person: Are you here for Ronin?? [shouting]

Me: What?!

Person: I said.Are you here for Ronin?? [shouting]

Me: WHAT?!

Person: ARE YOU HERE FOR RONIN?!?!

Me: ERM.YEA..I GUESS I AM.

Then we left earlier. Went to Mac's to have dinner....Then...

Eeqah: Eh.I think that girl is from my primary school.

Violet: The girl serving us ah?

Eeqah: Yea...She looks familiar.

Me: Ask her lah.

Eeqah: Don't dare lah. I pai seh....

Me: Please lah. This kinda thing.

Eeqah: [asking the girl] Excuse me, were you from RGPS?

Girl: Ya. [walked away]

Eeqah: She is so dao to me...

Me: What do you expect....

Violet: Yea.RGS what. Anyways, Geraldine. Not everyone is like you. So friendly!!

Me: Thanks lah!! Haha!

After dinner..Eeqah still wanted to go back! Crazy!!! I was like..dying of boredom! I did not mind going back...But.It was just boring.Haha!Eventually, we decided to go home.

Eeqah: Should we go back??

Me: Okay. I must go back early anyways. Zaw needs help.

Eeqah: Haiya. Yea lah! You love him so much...

Then.On our way back..We chatted about everything under the sun in the train on the way back. And as usual.We did not manage to finish......So our stories are to-be-continued on monday.Stay tuned...

Now saturday.I spent the afternoon in the Bishan house. The new maid is called Ani.She helped me do my nails!!!! And its not that bad....And in the lift.

Mommy: Why aren't you talking to Fernando nowadays?

Me: Nothing to talk about.

Mommy: Then why don't you start something? I know you are good at such things. He isn't the kinda guy to make the first move.

Me: Too bad. I'm not the kinda girl to make the first move either.

Mommy: See?? That's your problem! How are you going to find a guy??

Me: I don't need to make the first move.

After that.We took the bus to Aunty Lisa's house for the poolside party.In the bus, there is a WEIRD couple.They kept on snuggling...and *ahem*. Obviously they are sexually involved.Finally we arrived at the bus stop.But it was a little far..And I was on heels!I had to walk walk there.After that, I had to go 7-11 to buy ice.I had to lug 5kg! for 300-400m.On heels! Back to the house.At the party.Met a few nice people...Ate some good food.Did I mention..I'm in love with that penthouse?!?! It has.....

1. a jacuzzi on top of the house.
2. cool furniture!
3. posh toilet...[good for times of constipation]
4. good security
5. high class neighbours
6. the pool overlooks the scenery
7. the gym overlooks the pool

IT SO GORGEOUS!!! I want a house like this! Probably after I come back from UK [if I go UK that is...], I will buy something like this. SO NICE!

I LURVE IT!!

Then after dinner. They had a few games of black jack. Aunty Karen did not win any games..Until I went over...She won about $20+++ in about 20mins.Haha! Well.After everything.Took a cab home.Suddenly....In the cab.The cab next to us...The passenger inside stuck his middle finger at my driver. My driver got pissed..And they almost got out of the car and fought.My driver sped across to find out.And wanted to follow them.It was so freaky! I thought I was gonna die the way he sped! Haha!! Well, obviously I didn't.

Alrite.LONG entry.But its for 3days!!! :)

2006-06-21T07:40:00.000-07:00

My Nerves SHOT! And now I must draw a line....

Actually, this nerves getting shot thingy happened yesterday. Shah suddenly had this...splinter! Halfway while dancing..he kept on giving me signals. So I mouthed, "Why?" Then he showed signs of pain, but I didn't take it too seriously. My bad!!

Before I knew it, he was sitting on the bench, crying. But I did not know! I seriously must learn to be more sensetive!! I was standing like..next to him?? Everyone was crowding around him, and he was crying in pain. Then he called for me, I quickly put my water bottle down and went to him. He was in agony! GOSH!! He was squealing practically...And he clutched onto my hand. It hurt okay?? Then he lied down on my shoulder...like nearing my chest area.

Shah: Geraldine.I'm sorry...

Ko: Don't worry Shah! She is your future wife anyway!!

Me: Ko!! [stuck my middle finger!] Shuddup!! What will Zaw say??

Ko: Well!! What he doesn't know won't hurt him!!

Me: Well!! I don't intend on cheating on him!

Shah: *screams!!*

Me: Okay okay...Shh shh...Its okay. I'm here.

Din: [he gives me his dumb face] Geraldine....I'm seeing things!

Me: Wow..How fascinating!!

Then shortly after, they managed to pull out the splinter. And Shah was still crying...Poor guy. But after that, I kept on trembling. I don't know why! In the toilet....

Me: Dammit.I pity him man!

Thiv: Gerry..I'm telling you. He likes you!

Me: Well, too bad!! I'm with Zaw!

Sheila: I think he is hopping you will break up eventually.

Thiv: Yea! I mean..your relationship with Zaw was on trial basis. And you are making it work!! Because??

Me: Because I love him. Simple & sweet.

And after that incident, my bar dancing was horrid! Once I got on the table, I could barely think! When I popped down from the table, everyone was like.."What happened?!?! You were so HOT last week!" I just shrugged and sighed.

As for today....

I was like..15mins late for the meeting. Haha!

*mobile ringing!!*
Thiv: Gerry...where are you?

Me: Erm.Reaching.....Yup!

Thiv: Alrite. Everyone is here already!!

Me: Even Dinesh?? I thought he won't be coming!!

Thiv: Haha! Well, he is here!!

Once I got there..........................

Me: Oops! Am I late?

Fat: No! You are so early!!

Din: Yes Geraldine! So early!

At the bus stop, we were talking about soccer....players.

Eeqah: OMG! THAT PLAYER IS SO HOT!!

Thiv: Yea! Totally!!! I support England! Because only one player is NOT cute.

Me: Oh.Rite...

Geet: Obviously you don't watch soccer...

Me: ^^"

Eeqah: There are like..3 channels or something. I always pick the one with the close up of the player!!

Me: Huh?? But like that...isn't is hard to view the entire game??

Thiv: Who cares?! I just wanna see how hot the player is!! Haha!!

Then, we headed down to Great World and bought our tickets for the RV movie. And I just realised...Dinesh loves looking out the lift!! Haha! That loser!!!

Eventually, we got into the cinema. And Eeqah went.."WA! SO MANY PEOPLE!!" Haha! Well, obviously it was so empty! There was like....3 people behind. Then plus 7 of us. 10! in a cinema!!

We threw popcorn at each other..Dinesh & I had a burping competition. Haha! Shared nachos and coke....The movie was damn funny. Quite draggy though..But funny.

Din: Geraldine....Its so....boring........

Then he will shift in his seat and sink down. Haha! Weirdo!!

After that, we went to Tiong Bahru. Fathima was supposed to be in school at 1pm. But at 2..We were still at Tiong. She didn't wanna go back!! We took neoprint.....And of course.We squeezed!! This Thivya is forever getting lost somewhere!! Ateeqah splatted her face in the middle of nowhere! And Dinesh would just pop in front, pull me down, and put his arm around! Like some dumbo!! Haha! And we cut out the neoprints and gave out to everyone...

See???? Can tell it was HELL trying to fit in!!!!

Then finally. Back to school!!!

Before our scenes, I played Murderer, Bingo and Tic Tac Toe! As usual, I won Dinesh!! Haha! And he kept on claiming that he is a Bingo expert!! He didn't even know how to draw the boxes lah!

My dancing was MUCH BETTER! I felt so much better on the table. Then when I popped down....Everyone said, "DAMN! That is the Geraldine! HOT HOT HOT!!!"

I'm so happy!!

Kaes! End here!! Bye!!

2006-06-18T01:57:00.000-07:00

My Dream Wedding????

Sensitive issue.

Anyways,I had just returned from my cousin's wedding, not bad.The environment was quite pleasant,the service was okay,the food was edible.It was buffet style.The wine was not good though.Too thin, not stored properly and obviously one of those leftover bottles. I drank up one cup, and stopped there. Being buffet style, I did not take much food. If you know me well, I like to be served. In other words, I'm a lazy baboon. My mom is of course, different. She took quite a few rounds, while I sat there sipping my wine with a bunch of strangers.

This cousin of mine is my father's side. Obviously meaning that ties had been broken and by blood, there is no more relation. I very reluctantly went to the wedding, however I knew how to appreciate their invitation. They still very much take us as a family. So sweet!! My table was just the 2nd from the stage, which is good. I could see everything! And the groom, my cousin, kept coming over and asking if everything was fine. His wife seems nice, pleasant girl. My auntys and uncles were cute....I didn't see them for almost a year.

"Zhen Zhen ah! [my family name] Aiyo! You have grown!! So pretty!!"

"Very soon it will be your turn! Do you have a boyfriend?"

Then I nodded.

"Handsome or not?? Must find someone who really loves you okay? Then introduce to us!"

Throughout the dinner, my mother and I had a conversation about how different my wedding would be.

Me: Mom, this wine is...

Mom: So I assume your wedding is going to be different. Better marry a rich man.

Me: Well, for one. My lunch reception would be at the Westin, at the highest restaurant...It won't be buffet for sure! I will have my guests served. Each table will have 1 watier or waitress, so people won't be left unattended. My wine shall be imported from Europe, at least 8-10 years old. This wine now is about 1-2 years old only.

Mom: Yea I know. Your uncle will make sure your wine is good.

Me: My gown will be much grander. And my husband will look hot. Haha!!

Mom: -.-"

Me: Then after my lunch reception, I would have my dinner at Fullerton. Same thing, guests served, good wine, good food. Blah blah.

Mom: I pity your husband and his family. Marrying you will burn a BIG hole in their band account. And your stepfather will be crying over the bill too.

Me: I haven't finished. After all that, I will charter a private jet for my family and close friends to somewhere. For a grand church wedding. Honeymoon...not decided. That has to be discussed...

Mom: I don't want to know. So expensive your wedding!!

Me: But of course, most importantly, I must marry someone I love lah. No point if my wedding is even grander than this, but I don't love that guy....

Mom: So, found anyone?

Me: ..Maybe.

HAHA!! Well, I don't know if I will even get married.

Oh yea, I told him already! I told him about that 2months thingy, and he didn't seem angry. He may be angry lah, I don't know. We hardly ever share our true feelings anyways. But that could slowly be changed....Just like my feelings. It is so weird!! I still remember the first time I was with him. I accepted him too quickly, but I did because I felt something special..somehow. It was thru a period of 8 weeks.

1st week.....
Friends: Huh?! So fast?! Other guys have been after you for years!! This one just came along, and you agreed??

Me: I don't know. I don't think it will last long anyways.

Friends: Ha! Bet with you, you won't last longer than 2 months!!

Me: Fine!

2nd week......
Friends: So...how?

Me: That night we broke up for a while. Because I sorta cheated on him with his friend. The one that introduced us...

Friends: So?? He broke up lah!!

Me: Kinda....But we are okay now. I cried that night...

Friends: ......You can't be serious. When you break with guys..you don't feel ANYTHING! The guy can be there crying, you can be happily joking and stuff!!! WHATS WRONG WITH YOU?!

3rd week.......
Friends: Almost one month....

Me: I seem to be happy with him....Yet, can't stand his bloody ego.

Friends: Geraldine. We borrowed from the library this book...Do you know? Leo+Taurus = fights+fights+fights!!!

Me: Realli.....But still can tolerate lah.

4th week.......
Friends: Its one month!!

Me: Yea...Still got one more full month to go.........

Friends: We saw him that day. He is not bad lah. But can tell he quite got ego...

Me: Quite?! He is flooded with it! I also think that he is not serious anyways....He hardly shows that he loves me. Maybe its because I got too much attention from my ex-s.

5th week......
Me: 3 MORE WEEKS!!! AARRGGHHH!!

Friends: Relax..........

Me: I don't know. I can't wait for the 2months to be over...yet I enjoy being with him. Is there like..something WRONG with me?!?! I'm not supposed to be like this!!!! I'm supposed to be playing.....

Friends: What if you really fell in love with him?

Me: If I fall in love with an egoiste, it's real love. Because I HATE big egos...

6th week......
Friends: Heyy...heard you broke down that day.

Me: Yea.At Far East..I cried. Well, almost cried there. Then I went home and weeped. Beause I thought he was cheating on me.

Friends: Remember there was one ex who cheated on you....YOU DIDNT GIVE A DAMN!! you took it as a GREAT reason to breakup!!

Me: Yea I remember. But I still don't wanna break up with this guy. It's okay. I will go thru the 2 months, I'm close to finishing it!

7th week.......
Me: YAY! I'm close! So close!! Mmm~!! I can feel my singlehood coming back already!!!!!!! Anyways, why would I want him?? He doesn't even want dogs next time!

Friends: Yup, so close. Thru all this time, can't he tell you wanted to break up already???

Me: I don't know. I sent off signals!! But he doesn't seem to wanna break up....

8th week.....
Friends: GERALDINE!!!!! CONGRATS!!!!!! ITS 2MONTHS!!!

Me: Yup! :)

Friends: So, how did you break it off??

Me: ....I didn't......

Friends: Why?! Geraldine!! According to Natalina, he is an asshole!!

Me: He can be quite an asshole. But lemme tell you guys something....I LOVE THIS ASSHOLE!!!

Friends: That sounded wrong!!!!! Haha!!

Me: I don't know why! But I love him! And I'm actually glad I went thru all these 2 months. I have never really loved anyone before!!

Friends: What if he is just playing....

Me: I hope not.

Friends: Actually, we saw it coming. It was obvious you were slowly falling for him. It was different from other guys, that there was no change of feelings.

Me: :)

Kaes..this is one LONG entry. HAHA! I shall end here!! Take care!!

2006-06-17T08:38:00.000-07:00

Hot PlayBoy --into--> Sizzlin' Go-Go Girl

Yup!! That is certainly what I have become in the musical! I did not expect my role to demand so much from me...I have to change genders between scenes now!! First.I have to be this HOT playboy.Boy...Who ever thought of ME as a boy?! Lemme show ya...

Friends: HEY! Heard you got into the musical.What's your role?
Me: Oh.A Boy.
Friends: HAHA! No seriously...
Me: Yea.Seriously..A Boy.
Friends: .....Is the director BLIND?!

That was the basic scene in the beginning. Now everyone pretty much got used to it.

Well, after my first boy dance - which is COOL! Have to like..go on the floor.Turn around.Slide.WOO-HOO!! Anyways, after that scene, I have to change into a GO-GO BAR GIRL!! I have to stand on the table.And groove.Not saying that I don't enjoy it of course...=P but I know my mom will simply FAINT! Mrs Kong will simply DIE! It is quite scandalous. I was shocked to have to change gender....so drastically.

Lor [director] to Des [dance instructor] : I got the dancers for the city song.But now I need actors...I need someone for this *psst psst*.

Des: Geraldine.

Friends: Hmm! Wonder what is going on...

Lor: Yea.Can. Okay! The actors for the song shall be...Issac, Thivya, Geraldine, Zhi Hui, [and 2 other girls.forgot their names. SORRY!].

So.We all stood up, and went to the side as told.

Lor: Issac, Thivya..Drunk guys!

Friends: hahaha!!

Lor: Zhi Hui and [those 2 girls]..Beggers!!!!

Friends: HAHAHAHAHA!!

Lor: Wait...until the best one.Geraldine! Go-Go bar girl!!

Friends: WOOOOO-HOOOO!!! HAHAHAHAHA!! HHHAAWWWTTT!!

I did not know how to react. I just stood there, and laughed too. And Shah, was on his kneels..hailing me. Haha!

But first dance on the table was HOT. According to people.

Ed: I saw you from behind when I was studying. Man! You are HOT!!

Meh: Your actions were...sssss...whoo..

Eva: The butt was hot!!!

Des: Geraldine! You will make a very good bar girl man!!

Lor: Yea Geraldine!! You have heard your calling!

Fat: So sexaye! I shall book a room tonite for both of us ya???

I watched my dancing...it was taken on the school's video cam. I watched it before the camera guy took it back. And..I dare not comment on my own dancing. HAHA! But I was told to watch 'Hips Don't Lie' or 'Buttons'.Thats why that video is posted there! It's to remind me...And basically get those steps in my head.

After being a bar-girl, I will have to change into the boy again. And dance the final song. You should see my blisters!!! My skin is like...TEARING APART!! Oh well, I shall end here. If I can get videos of the rehearsals, they shall be put here.